Fallen Gods
by Somnambulista
Summary: The events as told by several different characters, including Zack, Sephiroth, the Turks and the Shinra family, as well as three OCs. A rise and fall of an empire, and an era. Rated T for language and situations. Read and review!
1. Author

**Disclaimer**: I did not create the Final Fantasy series. I do not receive any profit from this work of fiction. This is completely a work of fiction, and any resemblance it bears to persons in life is pure coincidence./b

**Author's Note**: _So, I've adhered with much of the original storyline, choosing to insert new characters along and try to twine them in with the normal plot. Because the ground is always shaky with original characters, I've tried to use a lot of the "unknown" factors; things that may have been addressed later on in guides or by the Word of God otherwise, but not things directly in the gameplay itself. You will definitely notice that parts of the dialogue from the original game are in here; large parts are in tact, though some have been changed._

_Anyways, on with the story. This is going to be going back and forth in time, so I'm going to be doing my best to try and keep everything as organized as possible. And, I felt that I should say this here, since it might seem like it'll head in that direction several times... this is definitely** not** a love story._

_Happy reading!_

_~ Angie_


	2. Homecoming

**NIBELHEIM**

_5 Years Ago_

_Zack_

_By the time I'd gotten away from Violet, it was twilight. Nibelheim was still and silent, as it always was during the dark of the night. I admitted to myself that I missed this place. It felt as though I'd gone from childhood directly to manhood, and that bothered and excited me at the same time. I wondered idly if Sephiroth had even had a childhood at all. As bad as it sounded, I thought of him a lot. I'd never met someone I admired so much before. When we'd first met, I was literally a boy, and he was a teenager. I remember him, like a silver spectre, his presence laced throughout the SOLDIER program. _

When I was fifteen, he caught me writing a letter to Violet. Instead of making fun of me like the other guys would have, he watched with mild interest, his ethreal aqua eyes attentive, flitting across every line as I wrote. It was incredibly awkward to have him hovering over me as I did such a private task, but at the same time, it made me wonder even then how many little meaningful moments (the meaningless ones, because those were the most important) he'd missed. He'd been inducted into this program... it was rumoured from birth. I didn't even know how that was possible. Still, the day he caught me writing the letter, something changed between us. It was as though it humanized me to him.

He'd asked about her then, and I'd told him everything I could think of – that her hair was the colour of sunshine, that her eyes were the colour of honey, and that her voice was as sweet as a songbird. Of course, he'd laughed, but when I showed him the newest photo of her I'd gotten (with Tifa, no less, taken with that old Polaroid camera), he only nodded his head. "She is as you say," was all he'd venture on the topic. Still, I wasn't to be deterred – when we'd gotten to Nibelheim and we'd gotten settled, the first thing I'd done was introduced them.

"Violet, I've got someone I want you to meet," I told her. It was difficult to pry her arms from around me, and in truth, I didn't want to. I wanted to hold her forever. She squirmed within my grasp, fighting me fighting her, and finally she let go – but not before a fierce kiss.

"Zachary Fair, I've seen you in nothing but poor penmanship for five years. You mean to tell me you want to run me through the gauntlet before you even give me a solid hour of your time?" she demanded.

"I intend to give you more than an hour," I advised her. "Just do this one thing for me. Have dinner with us. Listen to us talk about things you don't care about. Let your grandfather believe I'm not going to spirit you away in the night." I was trying to reason with her, but I didn't know if it would work.

She pressed her full lips together and narrowed her eyes at me. We were in her room, which I was going to stay in, which her grandfather did not know about. If we were to continue for him to not know about it, I needed to try not to sneak around with her when he _did_ see us together. We were sixteen, it was only to be expected.

"Fine. Gosh, you've been around these guys forever. You'd think you'd had enough of them," she taunted. She entwined her fingers in my own, drawing herself into my arms for an embrace that was gentle.

I felt a flutter in my chest. It was the same every time I even thought her name. I felt as though because so much of my life was being skipped, rushed through and beaten out of me by Shinra, that emotions like these would come on strong like an avalanche. Sometimes I didn't know how to explain them – intense rage, deep sorrow, and a strong yearning for... something. I rested my chin atop her head and smiled, the scent of her shampoo filling my nostrils. "You'll see what I mean."

Later that afternoon, Violet had gone to find Tifa. Tifa, who was utterly heartbroken that Cloud hadn't come home – despite the fact that he had. He was hiding in the room he shared with the other man, and I didn't really understand why. We hadn't spoken a lot – usually my conversation was reserved for Sephiroth, but only because he tended to have a darker sense of humour that made the others uncomfortable. I found Sephiroth outside, sitting on the old steps that lead up to the Shinra Mansion, and to the gates that lead to Mount Nibel. The town was unusually quiet, which left me with a sense of foreboding that I didn't quite understand. I chalked it up to nerves for the mission ahead, and didn't think about it again.

"Hey, you missed Violet," I said, coming alongside him. "She's with a girlfriend right now, but she's coming to dinner tonight." I dropped down next to him, palms flat behind me. I glanced back in the direction he was looking, at the mansion. "Hey – you in there?" I asked.

He was so still for a moment he seemed inhuman. Well, he always seemed inhuman, but it was more of a crafted, perfect nature – now he seemed like a statue, or, no – like a gargoyle. Suddenly, he came back from wherever he went in his head and snapped his head around to me. His entire body tensed, as though he had been surprised, and he seemed for a second that he was about to throw a spell.

"Zack!" he barked. Recognition washed over his face and he visibly relaxed. His eyes widened with his brows lofting for a moment, and he gave his head a little shake before looking ahead, towards the water tower. "What?" he asked, letting me know that he knew I'd spoken but he hadn't heard what I'd said.

"Good thing I'm on your side," I said in jest. He made a throaty noise of disapproval at my joke, and I pressed on with a roll of my eyes. "I said, you missed Violet, but she'll be at dinner later. If you're still feeling up to it?"

"Oh, did I?" his voice sounded empty. "Sorry. Yes, I'll be there. Doesn't appear there would be any other option besides sleep anyways, and I'm not feeling tired." There was a long delay, and then he flicked his bright eyes over at me, as though he were going to say something further and didn't.

I stood up and brushed myself off. The dirt clung to my black uniform pants like chalk, but it came off with a few pops from my palms, thank Odin. I definitely didn't want to walk around with a dirty butt all day. When Sephiroth didn't prompt himself, I walked to the bottom of the stairs and moved into his line of sight. Since he was at the top, and tall, it put me about eye-level with him.

"Is everything okay?" I asked. My voice had a hint of warning to it.

He gave me a strange look. "The reactor's going haywire and it's drawing horrible creatures to it, and there's a deep possibility that it's actually _spawning_ them. I'd say something is very wrong," he said, his brow lofted. His tone was puzzled, as though I should have known why he was so pensive.

I burst out into laughter in spite of the severity of his statements. Everything he said was true, and in fact, I had to admit it terrified the shit out of me that these things were coming off of the mountain and into my hometown. But at the same time, his utterly blunt nature just sidelined all of my fears and made me feel like everything was as cut and dry as he made it.

He smirked a little, and then rose. "What time is it?" he asked, shielding his eyes against the sun. We'd gotten there in the afternoon, but since it was fall, it was getting dark earlier. The mountain didn't help; it created the illusion of being much later than it was.

I glanced down at my watch. "It's only four-thirty. Listen, dinner is at six. I'm going to go try and convince Cloud to come out of his room." I rattled off a few of the stores in town in case he needed anything, which I doubted he did. I had seen the materia he chose to bring the night before, and damned if it wasn't all mastered. I had no idea how his skill level with magic always stayed so high, but I hoped I got there soon. Or ever.

"He's not going to come out," he said. He said it with such certainty that I hesitated.

"Wait, why?" I asked, nearly stumbling as I stopped mid-turn. "You're kidding, right? Violet's told me Tifa's done nothing but talk about him since Violet told her we were coming. That's just cruel if he hides for the entire time we're here."

To these statements, Sephiroth offered only a shrug. "He's insecure. Not my problem. I will tell you this, though, if he keep up the act, I'm going to become less than understanding." He paused, and something dark flashed across his face. It was the same darkness I'd been seeing a lot recently, and I didn't like it.

I almost told him to go easy on Cloud, but I stopped short. Things like that didn't fly, no matter how "friendly" we were. He didn't "go easy" on anyone, and in fact, none of us really did. If we did, then there would be no point to the program. "I'll see you at six," I prompted, ready to get away from him for a while. He waved me off as his phone rang, and I watched him turn and walk towards the gate that lead to the mountain path.

Sephiroth had always had the warmth of an icicle, but the last few days he'd become... I hesitated to use a word, because I couldn't really describe it. It wasn't as though he were obviously behaving differently, but given the fact that I looked to him as the man I wanted to be when I "grew up", it was easier for me to spot the differences than it was for those who interacted with him for only minutes at a time. He was always cold and calculating – they said that was the program. The SOLDIERs all eventually got wiped down to a simmering nothing when it came to emotions. It wasn't that they took them from us, but we were able to control them almost to a point where they were like flipping a switch. It seemed like his had been in the dim area, and recently it was hovering somewhere between almost off and 'never there to begin with'. He hadn't really _done_ anything to make me bring it up, it was just something I could feel.

I decided to ignore it, if only because it was easier for me to at the moment.


	3. Dinner

**NIBELHEIM**

_5 Years Ago_

_Zack_

_I hesitated for the briefest of seconds at the doors of the Shinra mansion. I knew he'd gone inside, but why? Ever since we'd gotten back from the reactor, he'd been scary quiet, just watching everything around him with those Mako eyes. He'd drifted into some deep form of thought that clearly didn't include an invitation for the rest of the world. I took a deep breath and pushed the doors open, heading straight for the stairs. This place gave me the damn creeps._

Dinner had, thankfully, gone well enough. Violet's grandfather hovered over us for a while; long enough for Violet to chase him away with dishes, anyways. We were all hungry, so the conversation was minimal, but it was obvious that Violet was upswept with Sephiroth, just like the rest of us. I felt like it should have bothered me, but it didn't. This was someone I had basically plotted my life goals around; if she didn't like him, then she sure as hell wouldn't like me in five more years.

Somehow, I'd gotten wrangled into helping her grandfather with those dishes, and by the time I'd finished winning what minimal amounts of his approval I could, I found Violet and Sephiroth sitting by the fireplace. They were across from one another, she on the couch and he in a high-backed cloth chair, but there was a quiet sort of intimacy I felt I'd intruded on. When I sat down next to her, she was in mid-question, and it was like I didn't exist.

"But, what did you do when you were little? Were you just training every day?" she was asking. Her soft voice was full of surprise, as though she couldn't fathom the idea of a child being subject to the rigorous regiment that the SOLDIERs went through.

His eyes wandered from the fire to me, then to her. "It wasn't like I had a home town to go to. I was born into the company, you could say. My mother, Jenova, died when I was very young. In fact, she probably died giving birth to me, but I can't seem to get the details hashed out on that one. That's as best as anyone can tell me."

"But you're not sure?" she pressed.

"Violet," I warned her quietly. This line of questioning wasn't one I'd ever heard him tolerate before. I hesitated to let her continue, if only because I'd seen him when he _did_ get mad, and I didn't want her to be in that path.

He held a hand up to me. "It's fine, Zack. Usually when they ask they're looking for some sort of tragic history they can put into a book. She's not." He shifted in the chair, a hand moving up to tug lightly at the small silver earring in his left ear. It wasn't something I'd ever seen him do before, but I'd seen Violet do it plenty – she did it when she was thinking about things she didn't like to remember. I was shocked into submission for a while longer.

"No, you're right, Violet. I'm not sure. But what choice do I have?"

"But you're Sephiroth," she said, her head tilted at an angle.

"Yes, _now_," he acknowledged. He seemed to get her meaning. "But then, I was a child. I didn't have the proper sort of family that a child is supposed to have. I was literally a product of the program. The best I can assume is that my mother was either an employee there, or that she signed me off to them. Or that they killed her and took me, but that's rather doubtful. I don't think it was as sinister as that, but I don't believe I've got the entire story. If I start asking questions _now_, though, they'll _really_ lie. Because you're right, now I _am_ someone, and if they've been omitting things before they sure as hell won't ante up the truth now, because now they've got a reason to be afraid."

_Great Bahamut,_ I thought to myself. _She's put something in his drink._ I had no other explanation for why he'd be so candid all of a sudden, but it made me a lot more wise to the fact that he had a reason to appear moody from time to time. I felt like a total ass for thinking he was getting closer to crazy, and sighed a small sigh of relief.

"But all those little moments – your first set of stitches, your first caught frog, your first kiss – you missed all of them?" she asked. "That's so... wrong." She cleared some of her blonde hair behind her ear, leaning against me as she got settled back down onto the cushions.

He laughed. "I definitely did have my first set of stitches, but they were followed by another, and another, and another," he informed her. When he saw the horrified expression on her face, he shrugged. "That's the truth, though. But, look at it this way, my dear – without all of that, there wouldn't be me, and then nobody would have come to fight the monsters."

"Hey," I said good-naturedly. "I came."

"True, but without me SOLDIER probably wouldn't exist. Which means you'd be running out there with a pitchfork and an outdated shotgun, not a sword and some nasty magic," he countered. "Don't mistake me for sounding egotistical; I'm not. But I do know that things would be marginally different if I'd had a life like you, and I don't know if that would be for the better."

"Shouldn't you be getting to bed?" came a gruff voice from behind us. We all turned, and Violet's grandfather stood hunched over a lantern. His pipe was jammed into his mouth and he had yesterday's paper crammed into the pocket of his tattered plaid robe. "Six AM is gonna come awfully fast," he reminded us. He turned and shuffled off into the darkness.

"He's right," Sephiroth said. "Violet, it was nice to meet you. Zack, I'll see you tomorrow at the gate. Tifa should be there around six-thirty, so we'll meet shortly before then. I expect it to be a very short mission," he added, with that smug confidence that came so easily to him. He rose and departed, leaving Violet and I alone.

"Well?" I prompted her, as soon as I heard his door upstairs shut.

She turned towards me, drawing her legs up onto the couch and folding them so that they were tucked to the side. "He's... He's intense. And I don't know if that's a good thing," she admitted. "He's very charismatic when he wants to be, though. It's like he's learned to work people."

What she described was something I'd witnessed him do no less than ten times since I'd known him – and that was only instances in which I was watching. Nevermind about the things I didn't see. "I don't think that's the program," I said. "I think that's actually how he is. Considering what a crapsack history he seems to have had, he's made the best of it." Yeah, so I felt the need to defend him a little.

Violet laughed and put her hand on my cheek. "I'm not attacking him. It's a valuable trait to have, just so long it isn't abused. Now, can we stop talking about your friend and focus on you?" she prompted. She leaned forward and gave me a kiss, and I felt that flutter in my chest again.

"My Violet, wise beyond her years," I mused, pulling away from her. "Let's go upstairs. We can talk about whatever you want," I offered.

We made love for the first time that night.


	4. The Library

**NIBELHEIM**

_5 Years Ago_

_Zack_

"_For the love of Hades, fucking STOP!" I yelled. He had lost his goddamned mind. I knocked a stack of books off of the table in my fury, a motion he regarded with but a curious glance. "What the hell happened to you?" I demanded. _

"_You ignorant traitor, I'll tell you," he spat. He looked down at the journal in his hands, and then threw it to me. I fumbled to catch it and turned it right-side up as he spoke, my eyes flicking back and forth between the handwritten notes and him as he spoke; he'd turned his back to me, hands at his sides. His fists clenched and unclenched as he dictated what he'd read to me._

"_The planet – this planet – originally belonged to the Cetra. The Cetra were an itinerant race. They would migrate in, settle the planet, then move on. At the end of their harsh, hard journey, they would find the Promised Land, and supreme happiness."_

_He whipped around. "But, those that disliked the journey appeared. Those that stopped their migrations, built shelters, and elected to lead an easier life."_

"_What - "_

"_They took that which the Cetra and the planet had made without giving back one whit in return!" he snapped, cutting me off. He smiled, shaking his head a little, and raised an accusatory finger at me. "Those are __**your**__ ancestors."_

_I threw the book down. "Sephiroth..." _

_He cut me off again, this time with a wave of his hand. "Long ago, disaster struck this planet. Now, your ancestors escaped." He began walking the length of the room, toward me. "They survived because they hid. The planet was saved by __**sacrificing**__ the Cetra. After that, __**your**__ ancestors continued to increase."_

_He stopped. "Now all that's left of the Cetra is in these reports."_

_I blinked rapidly. "What the fuck does this all have to do with you?" I demanded. _

"_Don't you get it?" he asked, throwing his hands up. He began advancing on me again, and as much as I wanted to, I didn't back away. "An Ancient named Jenova was found in the geological stratum of two-thousand years ago. The Jenova Project."_

_He was standing next to me now, that wild look in his eyes still. He was literally trembling with – rage? I'd never seen him exude so much emotion before, about anything. Oh, I'd seen him yell, and laugh, and even grimace in pain as he pulled a bolt out of his own arm after a battle gone awry, but it seemed like he was overloading. _

"_You're shorting out, man," I said. "You need to seriously calm down."_

_He spoke louder, talking over me."The Jenova Project wanted to produce people with the powers of __the Ancients – no. The Cetra." He paused again._

"_Oh, shit," I hissed. The tank at the top of the reactor. Jenova. Sephiroth. Violet had told me his mother's name was Jenova. "Oh shit, oh shit," I repeated._

_Unfazed, he concluded, "I'm the one that was produced."_

_It was a blur after that. My head was spinning. I know I spoke, but I don't know what I said. I moved in front of the door, trying to talk sense into him, but it didn't matter. I'd seen the journal, I knew what he was saying. He shoved me out of the way, and I collided with various bookshelves and smacked my head. I was only out long enough for him to get a head start, but with Sephiroth, that was all he needed._

_By the time I got to the first floor of the mansion, I could see the light from the fire dancing against the old and wavy paned glass of the large front windows. Sweet Ifrit. He'd set the entire town on fire._


	5. Discord

**NIBELHEIM**

_5 Years Ago_

_Zack_

"How about a picture before you guys go?"

I didn't have to look at Sephiroth to see the grimace on his face. He hated having his photo taken. I didn't mind so much, so I put my arm around Tifa. "How are you holding up?" I asked. I didn't have the heart to tell her Cloud was standing not ten feet from us.

"Eh," she said. I could tell it bothered her, but she just pulled the brim of her hat down and grinned. "It's whatever." I folded my arms with disapproval just as she glanced back up, and I heard the snap of the camera. When the photo came out, I laughed a little. Sephiroth looked like a startled cat. I said as much and he narrowed his eyes at me.

"It's too early for jokes," he warned.

I handed the photo back to the man. "Hang on to it. We'll get it a little later," I promised. I turned and followed them out of town, making casual conversation with Tifa along the way. I couldn't help but glance back at Cloud angrily every few minutes, but he was content to hide behind the face mask, and looked down at the ground for the duration of the trip.

When we got to the reactor, I stopped Tifa before she barreled inside. "Whoa," I warned. "Even on my best day could I not let you go in there," I told her. "Let alone when there are things inside of there I'm not even sure have the same genetic code as we do."

"I just want to see!" she complained.

"I'll take a picture," I said sarcastically. "Stay." And I pointed to a spot on the stairs where she sat in a huff.

"Any day now," Sephiroth said, standing in front of the door with an annoyed look in his face. I hurried up the step and in after him, taken aback by how sparsely lit up the reactor was. We walked through the pathways that lead us to the main room, dealing with some minor creatures along the way. I couldn't help but notice how deformed they were, as though they had been exposed to... radiation.

When we got into the room, I headed up the steps, pausing when I saw Sephiroth below. I turned to find him examining a large egg-shaped tank. "Down here," he called. "I found the problem. This is broken." He pointed to various wires and tubes. "They really sent us all the way out here just to do this? A plumber could do this," he snapped.

I trotted back down the stairs and set to work repairing the damaged parts, while he checked the tanks to get readings off of them. "The rest of them are fine. Well. Whatever passes for fine, in that state. Did you see?" he asked.

I looked up, a soldering iron from a repair kit under some shelves in one hand, zip ties gathered in my mouth. "Mm?" I asked. I quickly finished what I was doing, eager to get the hell out of this place. "Of course I didn't look. Should I?"

"Not if you ever want to sleep again," he told me, leaning against the railing and folding his arms. He had a small smirk on his mouth, like he was testing me. This was nothing unusual; there had been times where I'd nearly gotten killed over that 'I dare you' face he made. Maybe what Violet said was true about him, after all.

"I want you to know, I'm doing this against my better judgment," I told him. I grabbed the side of the tank and hoisted myself up with my arms. When I got a good view of what was inside, I saw a mutated sort of human, with tubes and lines running out of it. It was plunged in a bright blue liquid, and its face was frozen in a sort of silent scream that made me nauseous. I dropped to the ground wordlessly, and gathered the tools away, shoving them back on the metal shelf.

"Well?" he asked, eager to see the results of his challenge.

"I hate you," I snapped. "What the _hell_ is that? Are they all the same thing?"

"They've been exposed to high amounts of Mako," he said lightly. "Normal SOLDIERs, like you and I, are given very small doses to enhance our natural abilities – regenerative properties in our cells, muscle tissue growth, advanced knowledge which allows us to control magic – but this is... think of it as radiation poisoning for the sake of a useful mutation. You'll kill a lot of rats before you get one that can walk on two legs."

I snorted. "Okay, that's horrifying. But let's be honest, _you_ are not normal," I said with a laugh. "Maybe they got your cocktail just right. Now let's get the hell out of here."

"Wait a second," he said suddenly. He turned and vaulted himself up the stairs so quickly that I thought he'd seen another monster. But instead, his head was upturned, at writing above a set of very thick steel doors which were sealed.

I walked up behind him, a frown knitting my brows. "Jenova? What does that mean?"

"Maybe they didn't get that cocktail right, after all," he said to himself softly. He turned to look at me. "What? Nothing. Let's go."

"I didn't say anything?" I said. He brushed past me and was out the door so fast,I practically had to run to keep up with him. He stayed almost ten paces ahead of us the whole way back to Nibelheim. Tifa noticed this and did not fail to let me know how annoyed she was that she was being guided when she was, in fact, the guide.

"Just let it go," was all I told her.

Sephiroth was already in his room by the time I got back into town. I wanted to go after him, but friends and family swarmed me, making it impossible for me to break away without seeming like an ungrateful bastard. I spent the rest of the day with them, and with Violet later, opting to stay at my own home for the night rather than go back to the inn.

When he didn't come out the next day, though, I got a call from our command, who I informed only that there had been a delay and that Sephiroth would report back when he had a moment. I didn't want to cover for him, but I didn't really have a choice. I went to his door and knocked on it.

"Hey, man. The city is calling and wanting to know where the hell we are and what's taking us so long," I told him, leaning against the door. I didn't think he'd open it, so when he did, I almost fell through the doorway.

"What did you tell them?" he asked. He looked terrible. His eyes were wild, and his hair was a rat's nest. He was stripped down to sleep pants, and I could see a myriad of scars all over his upper body and arms. His voice didn't seem strained though – in fact, he spoke with demand, as though he'd just given me an order he expected me to follow.

"I told them that we were delayed and you'd report when you had a chance. Sephiroth, you look like shit. Did you sleep at all?" I demanded back after dumping that little bit of information on him.

"No," he snapped. "Go find something useful to do." And he shut the door in my face.

This went on for several days. By then, I couldn't hide at home any longer, so I came back to the inn. Violet was sitting outside when I got there, and she looked incredibly disturbed. I knelt down in front of her, taking her hand. "Hey, are you okay?"

She just shook her head, then leaned forward into my shoulder. I realized she was crying, but I had no idea why, and as much as I tried to get her to talk, I couldn't get anything out of her. Movement above us caught my eye, and I looked up to see the curtains from Sephiroth's room moving. I narrowed my eyes, and then pushed my anger to the back of my head. I'd deal with him later.

That night, we lay in bed, Violet curled up next to me. The moon fell into the room through the cracked curtains, laying a blanket of soft light over the thick comforter beneath which we rested. I was propped up on my left arm, my right wrapped around Violet with my fingers captured by her own, pressed to her sternum.

"I don't want you to leave," she whispered.

It was very sudden, despite the fact that I knew she obviously didn't want me to go. "I don't want to leave either," I told her matter-of-factly, "but it's my job right now. If I'm lucky I can stay on for fifteen years, maybe more."

She made an angry noise in the darkness. "Fifteen? Zachary Fair," she began, "are you serious. I'm supposed to wait here forever for you?" By her tone of voice, she really thought that was what she expected would happen. It cut me kind of deep to think that she didn't trust me enough to think I'd have a plan.

"Of course not," I said, a little too firmly. "In two years when I'm out of the beginning part of the program, I'm coming back on leave and we're getting married. I'm moving you into the city so you can get some actual schooling together. You still want to get a degree, right?"

She flipped over quickly and I could feel her staring at me, despite only the faintest glow of moonlight that reached her face. "Are you serious? Do you mean it?" she demanded. She was practically sitting up now, taking me with her by my arms.

"Of course I mean it. Hell, Violet. I've loved you since we were six. You think that five years gone would change that?" I said plainly.

"Well, no," she began. "I just thought – I don't know. Tifa said..."

"Nevermind what she said. She's just upset because Cloud didn't show up, and honestly, she should be. That kid pined after her the entire time we were growing up, then he takes the blame for her stupidity and leaves to try and impress her. It's just as well – he's probably over her stupid games." I was surprised that I unloaded for a bit there, but at the same time I felt a little satisfied. That was how it should have happened, anyways. Cloud was still pining for her, but it pissed me off to know that the brunette had sewn the seeds of doubt into my Violet's head when I'd never, ever think of just ditching her.

"You're right," she said. "And by the way, did you just propose to me?" she asked, her voice full of mirth.

"In an utterly uneloquent and lacking of a diamond fashion, yes. If you'll have me," I responded.

She answered with a kiss, and we fell back into the blankets.

I heard a soft knocking on my door, and I opened my eyes abruptly. It was twilight in Nibelheim, and the moon had gone behind the clouds. I slipped away from Violet in the darkness, grabbing various articles of clothing as I tried to avoid breaking my toes on any furniture I came too close to. When I opened the door, I was somewhat dressed.

"I think we have a serious problem," was all the soldier in front of me said. "Sephiroth isn't in his room."

My face blanched over. "Okay, give me a minute," I told him. I got the rest of my gear together and gave Violet a kiss on the forehead before departing. She was so serene when she slept; for a moment I thought about letting them handle this mess, but then I shook my head. No, this was my job now, and Sephiroth – well, he was the closest thing to a friend I had. If someone was going to talk to him, it'd be better if it were me than someone trying to bark protocol at him, right?

I went outside of the inn and followed the uniform to the front gate of the Shinra mansion.

"He went in there," was all they told me. Then they stared at me.

"You're serious?" I asked the uniforms. I looked back up at the structure, looming there in the cold darkness. "It could have been anywhere else," I muttered to myself. "Fine, I'll find him."

"There's someone inside already searching, but he hasn't come back out," one of them said.

"Oh, that's just awesome," I snapped. I shrugged my heavy sword against my shoulders and pushed through the old, rickety gate. Even in the darkness, I knew this place well. Dead plants littered the front, along with trees that had tilted to one side and wilted in the cold. Vines hung from the massive overhangs that shaded the front of the cement porch. The two massive wooden doors which I referred to as Purgatory waited for me, not at all inviting or encouraging in the slightest with their perfectly carved brass knockers fixed in the mouths of snarling lions.

I hesitated, and then entered.


	6. Becoming

**NIBELHEIM**

_5 Years Ago_

_Zack_

_I lay awake on the bed for quite some time, and I must have drifted off after a few hours. It was dark when I awoke, which meant the full day had come and gone, but something was different. It wasn't as though I could have heard Sephiroth shuffling around in the basement library from all the way in the East wing of the mansion, but the silence hung in the house like a blade above my neck. It was a different type of quiet – and not the good kind._

By the time I forced myself up the stairs and into the study, I spotted the uniform posted against the door. "Really?" I blurted. "They're outside thinking you were eaten by a Zolom and you're just in here standing around the whole time? That's awesome," I snapped. I ran my hand through my black hair, tugging at the tips with my knuckles. Hell yeah, I was nervous. I hated this place, and I wanted to collect my insane friend and leave.

"He went into this room, and then he vanished," the uniform said, his voice disbelieving. "He just... I wasn't that far behind him. It was like he disappeared behind the wall. Or he walked through it," he added.

"So you thought the best approach would be to hang out in the doorway like you were going to 'confuse' him back out of the wall?" I asked doubtfully. I gave him a lingering look of anger, and then walked through the doorway myself. I glanced back at the uniform. "Which wall?" I demanded.

He lifted a shaky hand. "That one," he said. He pointed to the corner, really, where an old brick structure was. It looked like – well, it looked like the flue for a chimney that ran the height of the house. I considered it for a moment, and then frowned. There wasn't a fireplace below this room; it was on the other side of the house. With a grunt, I shoved on the wall.

To my surprise, I fell right through it. I tumbled onto a rickety staircase that spiraled down into utter and complete darkness below. In fact, I caught myself on the rail before I went end over, which was probably a good thing – the weight of the sword swung me pretty hard. I glanced back at the uniform, and jerked my head.

"Take off," I told him. "I'll find him myself."

Was I irritated? Hell yes, I was. It took me about ten solid minutes of stairs to get down to the basement, which smelled like a combination of dead animals and mold. I could hear dripping from Hades only knows where, and there were random encounters with group of bats that were really beginning to piss me off. How did they even get _out_? Did they just live down here indefinitely? And the hall before the library smelled like shit – bat shit. The ammonia made my eyes sting, but there was light coming from under the door, so I went, crossing my fingers.

Inside, it was quiet for the first few seconds. The smell in here was all paper and metal and wood – shelves lined the walls of the cavernous library, stacked with books upon books. Most of them, at a glance, were old, spiral-backed notebooks and other bound journals. Many were history texts, but sprawled across the first desk I came across, it was all solo effort penned by whomever had been down there before me. Or, us I should say – I'd spotted Sephiroth in the hall, his back against the wall, legs crossed casually. He held a book in front of him and was reading, but his face was utterly empty.

"Hey, man," I said hesitantly. "Everyone upstairs is shitting nuts trying to find you. I think it might be best if you at least let them know you're okay," I advised. I approached him, and he responded by glancing up at me with a withering stare.

"You will tell them you didn't find me," he commanded.

I froze. "What?" I said. But he ignored me, brushing by me forcefully and sending me into the wall on my shoulder. I turned around after him, trying to get him to talk to me, but it was as though he'd checked out completely. I resorted to standing in the doorway while he literally tore the room apart, book after book. He'd take a pen out occasionally and mark something down, then set the book open-faced onto the desk noting what he wanted to go back to. Eventually, the desk became lost beneath the books he'd set there.

I watched this in various spots from the room for literally three or four hours before I finally realized he wasn't going to come out. He'd gone into the hall again and I followed him, where he'd paused beneath a pathetic hanging light just on the other side.

"My mother's name is Jenova," he said to himself. "Jenova... Project?" He turned his head to the side, brows knitted in confusion. "Is this just a coincidence?" he asked me. He looked back to the desk in the back room, and lowered his head. "Professor Gast, _why_ didn't you tell me anything? Why did you die?"

"Sephiroth..." I trailed. I approached him cautiously, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Come on, man. We'll figure it out. Right now, you've got a lot of people scared, okay? Hell, they woke me up in the middle of the night and they probably didn't even tell Violet where I've been for the past few hours. I'm sure it's daylight outside, now. Let's just go, and we can figure it out after you've had some time to sleep."

For a moment, I thought I'd gotten through to him. His shoulders sagged a little as his body no doubt begged for him to take my advice and rest, but that spark – that essence that was what we came to know as Sephiroth – fought his own body back. He tensed up almost instantly. "Leave me be," was all he said.

"Come on, man. I'm your friend. I want to he -"

He straightened, with his chin raised, though his back was still to me. "If the next words out of your mouth are you want to help me, Zachary Fair, I will kill you where you stand," he promised. "Get out. Leave me alone."

I let out a defeated noise, holding my hands up in defense. "Okay," was all I said. I turned and left the room, somehow able to avoid not looking back despite the fact it felt as though he had the Masamune angled at my back for the length of my walk to the door. I shut the library door behind me and went back up the spiral staircase, which creaked and groaned with every instance where my weight was upon it.

Once back upstairs, I really couldn't tell you what I was supposed to do. I wandered around the mansion for a while. Somehow after facing down with Sephiroth like that, the mansion didn't seem anywhere near as creepy as it had before. I found a room with a bed and laid down, closing my eyes for what I intended to be a power nap before I tried to reason with that bastard again.

Honestly, this was all pretty bad. Sephiroth had cracked, and I could see it. I was afraid to admit it to myself, but it was in there, floating around my consciousness. I rolled onto my back and put my hands behind my head, sighing as I looked at the patterns of water damage on the ceiling above me. I debated calling it in and calling it a day, but my loyalty to him wouldn't allow me to do such a disservice. No, I'd ride out the storm and do what I always did – back him up. If he wanted to throw a conniption fit when we got back and get some answers, I'd help. If it was stressing him out this badly, imagine how it would have felt if this had been a regular guy in his shoes?

Oh irony, how she makes fools of us all.


	7. Fallen

**NIBELHEIM**

_5 Years Ago_

_Zack_

I ran out of the mansion and back down to the street, where Zangan was crouched over a body. He whipped around, a crude weapon in his hands. "Hey! You're still sane, right?" he demanded, hands shaking as he clutched the – bat?

"What the fuck happened?" I spat. If that was any indication of sanity, he seemed to accept it. He waved my question away and told me to go check a house for survivors, which I did. My blood was boiling, and it wasn't from the heat. I knew what happened; I didn't have to pretend I needed someone to tell me. When I found nothing, I ran back out, searching the wreckage and flames madly for people I knew.

"VIOLET?" I screamed. Someone, I don't know who, said that they couldn't find her. It wasn't an acceptable answer, and I ran directly into the path of flames spawning from the inn to see if I could find her myself. I couldn't – I searched as much of the inn as I could, resulting in a momentary prison on the second floor when the staircase became engulfed in flames. From her room, there was only the ground, but I had no choice, and so I went.

I caught a break in some bushes that hadn't yet been turned to ash, but they were brittle and dry, so it didn't make me feel any better. As I rolled out, still looking for Violet, I saw a terrible vision through the flames. Sephiroth was stalking along the path, and he was literally mowing down anyone who got into his way.

"Get away from him!" I screamed. I knew all too well the damage he could cause. I started towards them and stopped short as the wall of fire burst up, accelerated by old crap it had finally hit. Through the curtain of heat, Sephiroth slowly, slowly look up at me. We locked eyes for a moment, and it was the longest second of my life. The Sephiroth I knew was totally gone from those eyes, and he had been replaced by a lunatic.

"No," I affirmed, through clenched teeth. "This ends, _now._" And with that, I fought my way through the fire and went after him. I knew exactly where he was headed, too – the reactor at the apex of the mountain. To Jenova.

As I ran by the men he'd attacked, they reached out to me. I turned, desperation battling with my rage. "Did you see Violet?" I begged. I could offer their wounds no attention – I'd never seen anyone survive that blade of his, and this was no different. When they couldn't answer me with any information I needed, I gave a last glance to them, and headed for the reactor.

As I climbed down the long chain links in, my mind raced. Where was Violet? Was she alive? Did she get out? I had no idea what had happened, but as far as I could tell, nobody had seen her since the morning when I'd gone to the mansion. It was as though she'd vanished. If that were true, than she was still alive – she _had_ to be. I'd find her, just as soon as I got this taken care of. I dropped down onto the narrow platform and took a deep breath.

Below me, hundreds of feet separated me from Mako energy, which was from this height nothing but a hazy, foggy blue. It smelled of ozone and made you light-headed if you stood around it took long without breathing gear, but right then I attributed my light-headed feeling to the blood pumping so fast from my heart I'd begun to sweat. I remembered suddenly the time when I was thirteen and the other SOLDIER inductees were all doing stupid things for fun. I ended up taking a triple dose of caffeine pills that day and they nearly had to take me to the hospital. Since then, I couldn't take little white pills of any kind without gagging, and Sephiroth had found this especially entertaining when Hojo had jammed antibiotics down my throat with me fighting for my "life".

The memory was meant to make me smile, but instead it just opened up that sinkhole in my stomach a little wider. Everything had been fine up until 24 hours ago. Couldn't I just go back and fix this? I struggled to find a logical answer, but none of it was coming. The bad part was that if Sephiroth wanted to do damage, he was going to just do that until he got tired of it. He certainly had the stamina for it, although I was praying that with no sleep and a bunch of mind-bending realizations, he'd be less on guard than usual.

As I ran the length of the walkway, I saw figures at the end, dangerously close to where the cogs were turning. Hunched in the doorway was Tifa, cowering over her father's fallen body. She was sobbing and saying something I couldn't hear. I got closer to her in time to see her close his eyes and lay her hand on his face gently.

"Sephiroth did this to you, didn't he?" she asked, glancing sidelong at the fallen Masamune on the ground. "Sephiroth. SOLIDER. Mako Reactors. Shinra. Everything! I hate them all!" she roared. She looked at the sword again, her face red and teary, and her grief-stricken eyes changed, filling with rage and stupidity.

"Tifa, no!" I yelled. I yelled it before she even reached for the sword. "I've seen this before, and it doesn't end well!" I shouted, but it was too late. She'd run into the doors of the tank chamber where Sephiroth had gone – presumably to see Jenova. Or, as he was calling her these days, 'Mother'.

I stood at the bottom of the stairs, helpless as Tifa charged right after Sephiroth. His back was turned, but his head was cocked slightly to the left – he saw her. In fact, he saw us both. As she took a swing, he whipped around and grabbed her arm. The sword was longer than Tifa, and her pathetic swing only put her incredibly off balance. Even on her best day, she was no match, but she had all but handed him the sword politely for the good it had done her.

He didn't seem interested in the tug-of-war match they'd gotten into, and so he yanked, hard. He ripped the sword out of her hands, and with a flick of his wrist had turned it. He arced it upward in a neat, silver flash, and then extended his long leg, a heavily booted foot planting the already airborn Tifa several feet further out as she fell. I watched her body bounce like a toy as she hit the first set of steps, rolling like a ragdoll as she came to a stop at the bottom on the grating.

From what I could tell, she was dead. I didn't stop to check, but I heard someone behind me, and when I turned, Cloud had come into the room, stripping his mask off and throwing it aside. I nodded down to her, and then spun back around and ran up the stairs. When I got to the top, the doors to the Jenova chamber were open, and Sephiroth was ranting – literally nothing he said made sense.

"Sephiroth!" I shouted. My voice, a roar, echoed in the otherwise empty chamber. It consisted of a massive tubular tank, the outside of which a metal structure of an angel was. On the inside, there was something more, but with Mako bubbling around it. It was not unlike the other creatures I'd seen before, with tubes running back and forth, but the face on this had been sculpted with such... care..

Suddenly, Sephiroth lunged forward and ripped the metal casing away, revealing the actual object behind it in the Mako. I thought I would vomit, and fought to resist the bile as it rose to my throat. _Jenova_. She had been here, this whole time? Sephiroth hadn't gone crazy for no reason, it seemed – I beheld the all-but-embalmed body of a woman, hooked to Shinra mechanics which monitored things I did not comprehend. Her eyes were open, and red; her body gray with black scrawlings all over it. Her hair flowed in the tank behind her, long and silver, much like Sephiroth's own.

He turned to look at me, and then went back to the pillar of liquid.

"They're all going to pay," he promised.

That was when I attacked. For all of the good it did – he blocked me without but barely a thought. I swung again and he blocked again, effortlessly. He stuck his arm out and caught me in the face, pushing me back just enough to get that damned blade some room to swing. The space we were fighting on was a glorified mezzanine, if only for the fact that it were about a five by five foot wide space. I was already at a disadvantage, but now I was at a really big one. I tried to back down the steps but it was too late – I saw the spark of silver and then I could feel myself falling backwards. When I got up, I was at the top of the stairs, and Sephiroth was at the bottom, the "angel's" head in one hand.

"Now they're all going to be punished," I could hear his low voice say in the quiet of the room.

I got up and ran down the stairs, but Sephiroth's movements felt supercharged suddenly. Before I had time to faint left or right, the edge of the Masamune went right for my chest, and all I could do was think something obscene as I realized he was manipulating time around himself. I slid down to the end of it, impaled straight through, but not dead yet.

"I was going to leave you there," he admitted. "But you got back up."

"What... the fuck..." was all I could gasp. I could taste blood in my mouth.

"It's better this way. It's more merciful this way," he assured. "You won't want to be around for what's coming next, Zack. I promise." And with that, he reached out and shoved me off of the blade with his boot as though I were a bug, a look of disgust on his face.

I managed to crawl into a heap on the bottom step, doubled over and contemplating my own existence. Cloud ran down the stairs after me, and looked to me, then to my fallen sword. He was bloody from trying to move Tifa, and no doubt whatever else he'd had to do down here with those things crawling around.

"Cloud.. get him," I managed. I slumped into the most comfortable position I could find, which involved me laying down on the steps, and closed my eyes. I could feel the ground becoming wet all around me, and for a moment I thought I'd pissed my pants – then I realized that it was blood, and I was somewhat thankful. For some reason, the idea that I'd pissed myself was much worse than the notion that I was dying. Death was acceptable; bed-wetting not so much.

I heard a loud yell come from the next room, punctuated by the sound of a body hitting the ground. After that, it went quiet. "Is he dead?" I called out. I couldn't even hear the sound of the gears turning, now; just a cool, comfortable sort of silence that washed over me like a warm wave. Come to think of it, it was getting kind of dark. Very dark, in fact. And I was tired.


	8. RECORDING ONE

**SHINRA BUILDING: HOJO'S OFFICE**

_25 Years Ago_

_From the Voice Records of Dr. Hojo_

"_The date is January second; 1977; the time is thirteen-hundred hours. Begin recording._

"_On March 11, the Jenova Project is set to begin. This all would have been happening much sooner, but Lucrecia is a stubborn woman, and I dare not test her when the balance of my project hangs on her as such. It's been two months since the other children were born, and Lucrecia spends much of her time with them, trying to understand – I suppose there can be no real harm in allowing her to behave as a mother for the time being. When our project comes to fruition, she will not have the opportunity, so I do hope she savors it while she has the chance._

"_The girl, President Shinra has decided, he wants to adopt. That son of his, already one and disappointing him. His wife has fallen barren and taken a keen interest in the female child, so I think we can make an arrangement. To Lucrecia's credit, she has not named the children yet, referring to them only as 'Baby', 'She' and 'He'. I think I could kiss Vincent for how much of an open wound he left with Lucrecia; I brought the subject up to her yesterday and she seemed willing to accept it. I told her that the president was considering adoption of both of the children, not just the female, however, so I'm sure that will get brought back up at a later date._

"_The male I'm not sure what to do with, yet. I believe he could be valuable for experimentation, just as his father was, but I don't know that I want to play Build-a-Monster with him. No, I think I'd rather make something a bit more refined. Perhaps a sleeper SOLDIER of some sort? I haven't decided, but when I do, I'm sure it will be brilliant."_

_End Recording_


	9. RECORDING TWO

**SHINRA BUILDING: HOJO'S OFFICE**

_25 Years Ago_

_From the Voice Records of Dr. Hojo_

"_The date is November twelfth; 1979; the time is oh-seven hundred hours. Begin recording._

"_The results of Seth's tests are highly favourable, as are Sephiroth's. Both boys show an advanced learning aptitude, even at their young ages, and they have begun to develop regenerative abilities for very small wounds. This, of course, caused us some headache during teething when they were in their early months, and several surgeries were performed to assist with the procedures. I assume by the time their adult teeth begin to come in, the problem will have worked itself out. If not..._

"_There has still been no sign of Lucrecia. I sent the Turks after her, but they accomplished a lot of nothing, as usual. It aggravates me to no end that she assumed that Sephiroth would be anything other than a science project for us, especially considering her willingness to subject her firstborn son to it. With the other, I can assume that she made a well-founded choice given the life of luxury the girl will lead, but if she found no problems handing Seth over, then why is she suddenly upset about not being able to coddle the other one?_

"_It is no matter. She has outlived her usefulness to me. She's now listed as a threat to the company and if she gets within one-hundred meters of this building she's ordered to be taken in. I'm sure I've got something that will straighten her right up, and if not – well, there's always Build-a-Monster."_

(There is a bit of commotion in the background, and a door can be heard opening.)

"_Dr. Hojo, your presence is requested. It seems Sephiroth has bitten one of his handlers and won't let go. There's a lot of blood."_

(A shuffling of papers can be heard as Hojo's chair scrapes across the floor.)

"_Damnit, Saunders. Can't you even supervise a simple feeding without it turning into a nightmare? What am I paying you for? Move out of the way!"_

_End Recording_


	10. PRESIDENT SHINRA LETTER ONE

**SHINRA PENTHOUSE**

_President Shinra_

_9 Years Ago_

_From the Desk of President Shinra_

_Rufus,_

_It pains me to know that you decided to blow off Serena's sixteenth birthday party because you wanted to stay out late with your friends. It may not have been so bad, except you decided to go to one of the bars in the slums, get drunk beyond your wildest imaginations, and then steal a car and drive it all the way back into the city. I won't even get into why you won't be allowed to use any materia until you're twenty-one, but suffice to say, a considerable and generous donation in **my** name has been made to the entire **city block** you and your idiot friends chose to wipe out when you decided to steal the Titan materia from my personal belongings._

_I really can't bail you out this time, son. You're on your own. I'm going to be boarding the helo shortly to Junon so that I can take your sister to Costa Del Sol as I have pomised. In the meantime, you can sit in that containment cell until I return. The guard has strict orders not to let you out, and to treat you no differently than any other violent criminal they've apprehended._

_Have a nice weekend._

_Your Father_


	11. PRESIDENT SHINRA LETTER TWO

**SHINRA PENTHOUSE**

_President Shinra_

_7 Years Ago_

_From the Desk of President Shinra_

_Rufus and Serena,_

_I regret that I could not be present for your mother's funeral. The business dealings with Wutai have gotten out of control, and my presence was required nearby to oversee. _

_Serena, I understand you may be grieving, so please feel free to take the jet to and go to the Icicle Inn for a few days to decompress. I've already assigned Reno to accompany you should you choose to go, so your privacy will be respected and your position will be protected in case anyone from Wutai's government has any ideas._

_Rufus, you are acting Vice President until I return. I need you to keep things in control there and push your feelings and emotions aside until I return. I expect not to be gone long, but for the love of Gaia, don't let my company fall apart in the minimal spanse of time I am absent. It's time to be a man, Rufus. Your mother was sick for a long time, so her death is something you have had a literal lifetime to come to terms with._

_Your Father_


	12. RUFUS LETTER ONE

**SHINRA PENTHOUSE**

_Rufus Shinra_

_2 Years Ago_

_From the Desk of President Shinra_

_Serena,_

_Totally broke into dad's office and had a letter dictated and sent to you. I'm sure you're telling him about my folly as you read this, so if that's the case please do tell him when he comes back up to his office to check the monitor for Camera D-4 so he can get a shot of you sucking face with Reno._

_Yeah, that's what I thought, bitch. Rat me out for stealing the jet again._

_President Shinra__ LOVE, YOUR BROTHER_


	13. Introduction  Aeris

**SECTOR 5 SLUMS: CHURCH**

_Present Day_

_Aeris_

"Zachary Fair, get _down_ from there!"

I heard her before I saw her; in fact, I saw the little boy first. He was precariously balanced atop a tilting pew, arms held out at either side like wings. He had bright blue eyes and spiked, jet black hair, but his height made me wonder of his age – he was four feet tall, at least. I set my basket of flowers down and walked further into the church, locating the source of the voice.

A slender blonde woman looked annoyed, to say the least, and was impatiently waiting at the edge of the pews. When the little boy ignored her wishes and continued forward, he began to stumble. The blonde gasped loudly and dove forward, catching him before he smacked the ground.

"I can fly!" he exclaimed.

"Phoenix's Ashes, don't _ever_ do anything like that again," she demanded, holding him tightly. He brushed off her concern with laughter, that was until he spotted me – and then he pointed.

I felt like a deer caught in the headlights. I had witnessed something special, and I felt like I hadn't a right to. I didn't know why, but I just... did. I offered a smile all the same, clearing some of my brown hair out of my eyes.

"Hello," I said warmly. "Please, don't let me interrupt. I just came to have a little lunch and relax. It sure is busy out there, today," I offered. They both looked stunned for a few moments, but gradually it wore off. With how dangerous this area could be, I couldn't say I blamed them, though the idea of me being perceived as a threat was laughable.

"I'm sorry, he just wanted to explore," she said apologetically. The child squirmed around and fought to free himself, before she finally just let him go. He barreled towards the spot where the yellow flowers grew and dropped down almost instantly into the dirt. He paused for a second, and then got up and ran back to the woman, who held two small metallic objects out to him.

"What do you say, baby?" she prompted.

"Please and thank you!" he cheered.

"That's my boy," she praised, releasing the things to him. She watched as he darted back to the dirt and sat back down, making noises as he moved what I realized to be toy cars around. He was careful not to damage the flowers still growing, and I was impressed by his regard for the plants.

"I'm Aeris," I ventured. I turned to grab my basket and then sat down on a pew near where the blonde was on the ground. She seemed content to stay there, watching him with her honey-coloured eyes, trying to split her attention between he and I.

"Violet," she offered. "That's Zack," she said, nodding to the child. "My son." She shifted her position, tugging at a small gold hoop on her left earlobe for a brief moment. "It's nice to meet you."

"He's got beautiful eyes," I commented, tilting my head as I watched him.

"Yeah," she said. She had a far off look on her face. I pulled my lunch out of the bottom of the basket for lack of anything else to say; I felt like I'd unknowingly crossed a sensitive subject with her. I could read a lot just by the way she spoke, the way she looked around, but I felt bad for doing it.

"So, Violet," I prompted, "have you and Zack been here long?" I took a bite of the sandwich my mother had made for me. Peanut butter and jelly never got old, right?

She glanced up at me and smiled. "Just a few days. Our house in Kalm had a plumbing explosion, so we came here to see an old friend. She had some errands to run so we decided to take a walk. To tell you the truth, I'm kind of eager to get back. This city is a little..." she trailed off.

"Oh, I understand. What's Kalm like, anyways? I've never been there myself," I confessed. I hadn't been outside the city, actually.

"It's..." she began. "It's a mining town. It's quiet, but nice. We've got a, uh, bit of a snake problem right now, but nothing that can't be handled. Hopefully," she added with a frown.

I had no idea what she could mean by snake problem, but I nodded anyways. "Sounds lovely. It'd be nice to get out of here once in a while. See the wide open blue sky, relax on a beach. I should really just do it one day, but I don't know. I just get nervous I'll make a mistake and won't be able to come home," I confessed.

"You live with family here?" she ventured. She glanced up as her son came running back to her, showing her a small ladybug he'd caught. She congratulated him on a job well done and then told him to make sure he let her go after he was done looking, which he did promptly. He sat down next to her, running the cars up and down the length of her shin.

"My mom. But a lot of the area kids come here to play, especially in the summer. They're kind of like my family, I guess. I've known them all since before they could walk. Maybe Zack could meet them if you're here long enough?" I offered.

"That would be really nice," she admitted. "He plays with a little girl named Marlene, but she's really his only friend. I'd like for him to be a bit more social with someone who isn't over the age of twenty," she laughed.

Even in her laugh, I sensed a sadness that seemed to pull her words down. I couldn't explain how I could feel it, but I could, and it bothered me incredibly. I wanted to make it a point to try and talk with her more; maybe I could invite her home for dinner. I was sure my mother would love the company, and there were plenty of games for Zack to amuse himself with that the other children left behind.

"Maybe you should come by later," I offered. "That is, if your friend isn't still busy. I don't live far from here. It'd be nice to have a visitor that wasn't under the age of twenty," I countered with a grin.

She seemed to consider this, and then nodded. "Sure, okay. She said she'd wouldn't be home until later, so as long as it isn't too far from the bar, I think I can manage."

As I opened my mouth to give her directions, there was a tremendous boom from somewhere outside. It sounded distant, but the ground shook and I knew it wasn't. I jumped up and instinctively grabbed Violet by the arm. "We need to move," I told her. I rushed them to the door just as I heard a loud crashing sound. I whipped around just as a body dropped like a rock onto my patch of flowers.

"Holy -"

"Zack!" I heard Violet exclaim. I turned back, and she had a hand clamped over his mouth, presumably to stop the rest of what he was about to say from coming out. "Are you going to be okay? Should we stay?" she asked. She was looking over my shoulder at the body, which I was doing my best to shield their view from.

"I think..." I hesitated. No, sure enough, a low moan came from him. "No, he's alive." I turned back to them and smiled. "I'll be fine. I'm actually pretty good at healing, so let me take care of this and I'll see you later on."

"He looks so familiar," she trailed off, rolling on her toes to see over my shoulder.

I walked away from them and stood over him, where he was now writhing in pain. I felt bad for him, but at the same time, that meant there were no broken bones. That was good – I hated mending bone, and I tried to avoid it if I could help it."You okay?" I asked. I realized the stupidity of the question as soon as I asked it, but I couldn't think of anything else to say.

When he looked around, the question of 'where' on his lips, I prompted him. "You fell into a church – in the Sector 5 slums? The roof just came crashing down. Gave me a little bit of a scare, you know," I teased him gently.

He was looking around still, trying to get his bearings. His gaze fell onto Violet and little Zack by the door, but it was only to their backs as they slipped out wordlessly into the afternoon with but a fleeting wave. He looked back up at me. "I came crashing down, you mean," he said.

"Well, you got lucky. The roof and my flowerbed broke your fall," I said sarcastically.


	14. Introduction 2  Aeris

**SECTOR 5 SLUMS: CHURCH**

_Present Day_

Aeris

He got up slowly, and for a moment it looked like he was going to vomit. I couldn't believe he was alive with an impact like that, but here he was, standing on his own two feet. The flowers below him were bent at awkward angles, and those that weren't were utterly smashed into the earth.

"Is that your flowerbed?" he asked. "I'm sorry." He sounded sincere.

"Hey," I said, holding a hand up. "They'll be fine. It's a sacred place, after all. I mean, they say you can't even grow grass and flowers here in Midgar, but they all move along just fine in this place. I love it here." I didn't know why I was telling him all of this, and so I knelt down and started instinctively trying to salvage what I could of the flowers.

I realized as he came closer that I'd seen him before, and I grinned again. "So, we meet again," I joked. "Thanks for buying my flowers, by the way." I paused, taking a second as he knelt down next to me to survey his damage. Actually looking at him... he was something. Handsome was a good word, but not the one I would have chosen. He was... dreamy. That was the word. His eyes were an absolutely magnificent shade of blue – oddly enough, they looked similar to the eyes that Violet's son had on him. It was odd, but I'd have to ask her later. Maybe they were related? He could have been her brother, I supposed. Genetics? It didn't seem like it. In fact, the energy around him was quite a bit different from hers, almost as though it was a vague sort of remembrance but nothing more.

"Hey, do you have any materia?" I prompted him.

He rocked back a little, scratching his head. "Well, yeah. It's kind of easy to come by these days. Why?" He looked like he was about to get robbed, and it made me laugh a little.

"I have some, but it's pretty special. It's Good for Nothing," I said, naming it.

He snorted. "No, you probably just don't know how to use it." It was kind of funny to see him try and puff up like he was versed on the subject, but he was a boy and as such I forgave him for the flaw.

"Ohho," I laughed. "Nice. Pretty sure I do, but it really just doesn't do anything." I stopped for a moment. Why was I talking to him so much? "I kind of like having it around though. It was my mother's. I'm sorry, I just feel like talking. I don't get a lot of visitors, but three in one day. Want to hang around for a while? I mean, twice in such a short span of time we see eachother, may as well."

"Yeah, sure," he said.

"Great. Let me go check on the other flowers, first. I need to ensure you didn't teach them to grow inward," I teased. I walked around to the other side of the bed and began examining them. They all looked okay, actually. That was good – these were my moneymakers aside from being a source of enjoyment, even if they didn't garner much. I'd rather not have to sell them at all and just let them flourish, but, alas...

"Oh, wow, I don't even know your name," I suddenly blurted out. "I'm Aeris the Flowergirl. It's nice to meet you. Formally," I added.

He had gotten up and was inspecting himself for bruises before I prompted him. He grinned back. "Well, Aeris the Flowergirl, I'm Cloud. It's a pleasure." And he reached behind him and peeled a crushed flower from off of the seat of his pants and looked out of the corner of his eyes as he nonchalantly threw it over his shoulder.

I couldn't help but laugh, the sound girlish and giggly. He was probably the strangest boy I'd ever met, and yet, I felt instantly connected to him somehow. I know how weird that sounded, but I just went with it. Tomorrow's not promised today, right? What did I have to lose?

"I do a little of everything," he offered. I was standing now, and he was only a few feet from me, casually looking around now that he wasn't in blinding pain.

"Oh, so like a Jack of all Trades?" I asked, brushing my hands off. Mercenary was such a dirty word. And speaking of the like, I watched as a familiar face came in from the front of the church slowly. He was standing in the center of the aisle, but to Cloud's back. The situation as it presented itself was literally like fate had said, 'Here, use this' and handed Cloud to me. I started to laugh.

He shrugged. "Something like that. Hey, what's so funny?" When I didn't answer him, he glanced over his shoulder. "Who's that?"

"Oh, don't worry about me," came the reply from the man at the back, who tipped his head to us both.

"Hey, Cloud, you want to be a bodyguard?" I asked him, grabbing him and pulling him closer to me so that the man couldn't hear.

"What?" he blurted, surprised.

"You said you do everything, right?" When he nodded, scratching the back of his head (a habit I learned he did quite frequently), I breathed a small sigh of relief. "Good. Get me out of here. Take me home."

He glanced over his shoulder at the man who was tapping his foot now, and then looked back at me. "Okay, sure. But it's gonna cost you," he challenged. It seemed almost like an empty demand, but I indulged him all the same.

"Okay, let's see. How about if I go out with you? Once," I specified.

He put his hand on his chin and acted like he was thinking it over, then shook his head and started to pull away from my grip.

"Cloud!" I exclaimed, hitting him in the chest.

He just winked at me, and then broke free completely and began walking down the aisle towards the man. "Hey man, I don't know who you are, but -" and then he paused. It was as though he skipped a beat. "Wait, do I know you? No – yeah, I do know you. That uniform..."

"Uh, hey sis, this one seems a little weird," he called over Cloud's shoulder at me.

"Shut up, you Shinra spy!" he blurted. It seemed he definitely centered on _some_ identity for him, at least.

Behind Cloud, the Shinra men suggested that taking Cloud down was a good idea, but the man waved them off with an, "I haven't decided yet."

"Don't fight here! You'll ruin all my flowers!" I screamed, yelling the first thing that came to my mind. _Flowers?_ I didn't have time to think. I grabbed Cloud and dragged him towards the door. "Come on, the exit's back here," I explained as he tried to make sense of the situation.

We ran through the back and up the stairs that lead to some unstable scaffolding. Cloud jumped clean across where a massive section had fallen through, but I stumbled and hesitated. "Oh, no," I protested as he held his arms out to me.

"I'll catch you," he promised.

Before I could try for another running jump, the guards below who had followed us opened fire. I panicked while trying to duck – naturally, because you don't just remain calm when people fire rounds at your body – and slipped. I landed on a large metal pipe for old ventilation and slid down, yelling all the way. It was all I could do, really, because I was heroic like that.

"Hold on!" he yelled from above me. I landed in a heap in some scraps and stood up, brushing dust off of myself and out of my eyes. As a guard advanced on me, a barrel dropped from the rafters and knocked him out, splintering around him. I managed to get up the stairs after a few more minor skirmishes broke out, and Cloud pulled me out onto the roof.

"Whew," I sighed. "They're looking for me again." I sat down on the roof to catch my breath, running my hands through my hair. I gingerly undid the braid and finger-combed it through as Cloud sat down next to me.

"You mean this isn't the first time they've been here for you?" he asked, his head tilted a little. I shook my head no, still fussing over my long hair, and he pressed on. "They're the Turks," he told me. He glanced around and then leaned back, stretching his legs out. "They work for Shinra. They're used to scout out likely candidates for SOLDIER."

I snorted. "This violently? I'd have thought they were trying to kidnap someone," I retorted. I began weaving my hair in and around itself in three strands, motions I knew how to do like clockwork. I could even do it half-awake, although the result was less neat than usual.

"Well, they're involved in a lot of dirty stuff on the side. Spying, murder..." he trailed off. He was looking around the city like he was seeing it for the first time, and it impressed me how relaxed he was. He seemed so natural just sitting there, taking it all in. It didn't help that he was incredibly attractive.

"They look like it," I said. I tied my hair off with my ribbon and glanced back at him.

He smirked a little, mostly to himself. "So why are they after you? Do you even know?"

"No, not really. I bet it's because I have what it takes to be in SOLDIER," I said with false enthusiasm.

"Heck yeah," he said, turning to look at me with those bright blues. "Wanna join? I have an inside line..." he offered.

"Tempting, but no," I replied. I stood up and surveyed the city from what I could see. "Anyways, I don't want to have anything to do with anything associated with them. No offense," I added.

He answered me with a lazy shrug. "None taken. Come on, let's get you home." And with that, he jumped up.


	15. SCARLET VOICEMAIL ONE

**WEAPONS DEVELOPMENT BRANCH**

_Scarlet McQueen_

_Present Day_

_You have **three** new voicemails_

_To listen to your messages, press **6**_

_To delete your messages, press **4**_

_To save your messsages, press **7**_

_To return to the main menu, press **#**_

_**6**_

_Received at **8:49 AM** from **Heidegger**_

"_Scarlet, you idiot! Where the f-"_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have **two **new –_

_**6**_

_Received at **10:23 AM **from **Heidegger**_

"_Are you tryi-"_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have –_

_**6**_

_Received at **12:01 PM **from **Rufus**_

"_Scarlet, I just got your message. Now, it might have been the whiskey I saw you hitting last night that gave you the idea to make an, as you put it, giant-fucking-super-laser on Midgar, but I've been looking over the shit you drew on your cocktail napkin, and I think it'll work. Get over here as soon as you get this. Oh, and bring some Asprin."_


	16. Morning

**RENO'S APARTMENT**

_2 Years Ago_

_Serena Shinra_

If I had been my brother, I would have been called an utter failure and a disgrace to the family. As it stood, coming into dad's office at noon with my stiletto heels slipped 'round my index finger and wearing the dress I'd gone out drinking in the night before was considered "having an active social life". I gave him a kiss on the cheek, paired with an enthusiastic, "Hi, daddy," and flashed him my seven-thousand dollar smile (literally, because President Shinra would not have his little princess in braces). There were a lot of things that I got away with doing because I was my father's angel, but one of them would not be what I was currently making a habit of doing.

"Hey, Bonkers," I said softly, brushing bright red strands of wayward hair from Reno's face. He lay on his back, the sheet wrapped around his lower half like a primitive skirt. I was propped up next to him, a sheer camisole and pair of stolen boxers from his clean laundry pile my only covering, and didn't care much – his apartment was a little cold, but I intended to remedy that rather shortly. "Wakey wakey," I sang, giving his cheek a little tap with my hand.

"Nnnh," was all I got back. He brushed my hand away and rolled over on his side, facing me. One pale arm shot up, snatching one of the pillows from below him, and he stuffed it over his face.

"Noooo," I sang, and reached out for a small black remote control on the bedside table. With a press of the button, the blinds shifted, letting the glaring bright light of the morning flood the bedroom. I threw the remote towards the end of the bed, and then reached with both hands for the pillow, sitting up for leverage. "Come on, get up! You promised we'd go to Costa del Sol today and I really really want to do that before my dad has a chance to get suspicious."

He opened one eye after realizing he wasn't going to get the pillow back. "He's not going to get suspicious, Serena," he chided. "Let me sleep a few more hours, yeah? I'm the only one he ever lets fly you anywhere, so calm yourself."

And then, "Did you seriously call me Bonkers?"

I grinned and flopped back down, snatching the covers from him in a quick motion that left him caught off guard, and then rather exposed. "I did. After the way you were acting last night – you know you almost crashed us into a skyscraper, right? That's the last time I ever let you fly drunk," I chided. I didn't know why it didn't bother me more. Perhaps it was because I felt like I didn't have much left to live for? I couldn't put my finger on it, but it wasn't something I could discuss with Reno. He wasn't in my life for deep, meaningful conversation. In fact, the only person I could have told was perhaps Rufus, and I reserved a level in Hell for my residency before I'd ever tell her darkest secrets to him.

He looked incredibly insulted, and cemented this by a snort I'd heard him make at my brother a few times over the last few weeks. "I could fly that helicopter blinded, drunk and with one hand tied behind my back," he snapped. Evidently his skill was something he wouldn't let be insulted. Prideful, always, my Reno.

"Maybe," I countered, my voice flat. "But if it's all the same, I'd appreciate you not killing me anytime soon," I told him.

"Not for a while," he agreed. He reached over to get at a bottle of water I'd been smart enough to put on the nightstand before him, and then sat up long enough to turn the blinds back down so that the sun wasn't burning his retinas. Then, he looked back to me and for a moment, seemed to have decided he was going to get up and start the day.

Then, when I was just about to say something, he lunged forward at me. A small tug-of-war broke out between us until Reno won out, and he enveloped me into his arms and pulled me under the scrap he'd managed to still keep on the bed. He wrapped his legs around me while I fought, squealing and laughing, until I finally had to give up. It was a little thrilling that he could overpower me so easily, but at the same time, he was as harmless as a kitten – wasn't he? He smiled at me just then, and it seemed to punctuate the sentiment. I leaned forward the small amount I could to kiss him, and he returned the favour. The moment was nice, stopped by him when I nipped at his lower lip.

"Hey, you'd better watch yourself there, tiger," he warned me. "I've got little cuts and bruises all over because of you, and most of them I can explain, but there will be a few I can't, and someone's bound to see me shirtless at one point or another."

I pulled away and smirked. "So how did you explain the hickey? Tell Rude that you stuck a vacuum to your neck?" I teased.

He laughed aloud, a hyena-like sound that I'd always found ear-shattering when I was little – until I was about fourteen, and then suddenly, it was like I'd "discovered" him. "I told him that I 'was forced to accompany you to the paintball range and you made me play'. Also, that you shot me in the neck. Which isn't untrue if you don't let it be – you really _would_ shoot me in the neck with a paintball gun," he continued.

"I wouldn't!" I protested. Total lie. I'd shoot him in a second. "Well, not in the _neck_. Nowhere _important_," I trailed off, the prospect of going to let off steam like that suddenly appealing. I sure as shit would shoot Rufus everywhere I could aim for.

"Oh Gaia, she's getting ideas now," he moaned. "I'm glad that you think most of me is important enough _not_ to shoot," he added sarcastically. "Would you mind telling me what those are, so in case you ever do try to shoot me I can use them as defensive measures?"

"Oh, I can do you one better than that. I'll show you," I offered. I leaned forward, pressing against him in a way that I knew would get my hint across, and he blinked rapidly.

"Oh, will this be a tutorial?" he asked, flashing a bright grin at me.

I was pushing on him in such a way that left him flat on his back, with me half-across his upper body. I moved to straddle him, and leaned down across his chest on top of my arms, which I'd folded. "I think it will be," I teased. "But, I mean, if you've got other things you'd rather do..." I conceded, moving my weight to the right to sit up and exit the bed.

He grabbed me and rolled me over, this time pinning me down. "Oh, no, you don't. Not with an offer on the table like that!" he protested. He looked over at his clock, and then looked back down at my surprised brown eyes. "Fuck the schedule. I want you to show me, in great detail, what parts of my body you think are _important_, Serena, and I don't want you to rush about it. I'm a little slow when it comes to tutorials, so you might have to show me twice."

Several hours later, I realized I'd missed the only actual thing I'd wanted to do today (besides him), and fished around in my purse for my cellphone while he showered. I sat, my long wet hair wrapped in a towel, in his desk chair amid paperwork I probably didn't need to know about. It didn't matter to me; I didn't give two shits what the company, the Turks, or my brother did. As long as they didn't shake my ground up any, they could do whatever they wanted with the rest of the world. Cruel? Maybe, but then again, the world wasn't fair, either.

I saw I had a missed call from a number I didn't know, and I frowned. There was a voicemail, also. When I listened to it, there was no noise at all, and then there was what sounded like a sigh, and the call was disconnected. I listened to it again, just to be sure, and then stared at the number for a long time. I had been getting calls like this for a while now, actually. Since last year, come to think of it – maybe once every few months, but recently it had sped up, resulting in a call every few weeks. They always came from different numbers, but it was always the same result.

There was a soft chiming sound, and my head snapped up. I realized that someone was buzzing in to his building and jumped up to find my clothes. I literally threw the yellow silk robe down and began yanking open drawers, finding the clothing I'd managed to leave here on various occasions. Underwear, bra – great, now, pants? Skirt? A dress? Anything? I panicked.

"What the hell are you doing out there?" came the sudden demand. I whipped around, and Reno was poking his head out of his spacious bathroom door. I could see the fogged up mirror behind him. His hair was still slicked back against his head, but drying, and he had a toothbrush in one hand and an electric razor in the other. The white towel he used was wrapped around his hips, threatening to fall off with even the slightest wrong turn.

"Someone's on their way up," I hissed. "I'm trying to find my damned clothes, but you _moved_ all of them!"

He surveyed me for a long moment in my underwear, and then pointed to the closet with his toothbrush. "It's all in there. Well, you found your unmentionables, which I like very much, but the rest of it is on the shelf in the back. Calm _down_, will you? You act like being seen with me is the end of your perfect world," he said. He went back into the bathroom and left me in my fit in the bedroom alone.

I dashed to the closet, finding the aforementioned objects and began clothing myself. Skinny jeans, a gorgeous black cashmere top I'd thought I'd lost, and a pair of boots. Thank _Gaia_ that boy had sense. I brushed off what he'd said to me, because he always made little biting remarks like that. It wasn't in his nature to care about me on a level that would have made the statement truthful, so I always blew them off. It'd started about two months ago from what I recalled, and I was willing to bet it was more his aggravation with my father than anything to do with me.

I raced around the corner in time to see the front door opening from down the hall. I tried to think of a way to explain myself, but I couldn't, so I just darted from the bedroom to the guest room, and then counted to ten and walked out. I saw Elena standing in the foyer, looking at her phone.

"Hey!" she exclaimed. "I didn't expect to find you here! What... _are_ you doing here?" she asked. She tilted her head a little. "_Sereeeenaaaaa?" _she asked slowly, a smile breaking across her face.

"No!" I practically shouted. "I just stayed here because I didn't want to go home last night," I protested. It wasn't out of the realm of impossible – everyone knew Rufus and I hated eachother, and we tried to make eachother's lives a living hell. Recently it had gotten a little out of hand and so I avoided him as much as possible.

"Oh, okay," she said. It was clear from her tone she didn't believe me, and so she rolled her eyes. "I'm guessing the ghost gave you that?" she asked, gesturing to my neck.

Stupidly, I stared back. "Huh?" I said.

"She means the love bite I gave you, my dear," Reno said as he walked by me. He slapped me on my ass, hard, and I jumped. He looked a little pleased to have been the one to drop the bomb, as usual, and slid by Elena to get into the kitchen, where he scooped the coffee pot up for a fresh cup.

"You're the only person I know who sets his coffee timer for two in the afternoon," she teased. She looked back at me. "Don't look so shocked, Serena. I've suspected for a while now – in fact, we all have. We're not going to rat you out, so calm down." She tossed her long, blonde hair over her shoulder and took a seat at the bar area of the kitchen, still splitting her attention between us and the touch-screen phone.

"Wait, you did?" I asked, dumbfounded.

From over his shoulder, Reno looked at me. "We work together on an almost-daily basis, Serena," he said flatly. He sipped his coffee and then came to sit down next to me, setting the mug down with a plunk. Instinctively, I reached out and pushed it away from the edge of the counter. He just gave me a look and rolled his eyes.

"Seriously," Elena agreed. "Look, it's fine. You guys are cute together anyways," she offered.

"Yeah?" I said. I hadn't ever really thought of it in terms of how we looked, but I guessed we did look pretty awesome together. Funny, I was actually thought to be shallow and it hadn't ever occurred to me. I guess it was because I didn't think of us as a couple in the traditional sense. Reno had started as someone I could cut loose with, and someone who'd really piss my father off when the mood struck me. But I realized I didn't want to jeopardize his job, so it ended up being a secret affair anyways. Why did I even care? I _did_ like him, but I knew this wasn't serious. He was more Rufus' friend, anyways. I guess I had actually done it to get Rufus more angry than my dad, come to think of it. It had definitely worked, too. Rufus was threatening to tell our father every day now.

"Can we just drop it? Serena, why don't you go get finished so we can get out of here. I think Costa del Sol is going to have to get scrapped. I was checking my messages and I have shit I need to get done that evidently Tseng hasn't forgotten about," he said, his voice irritated.

"Tsk, shirking your responsibilities," Elena chided. When he shot her a dirty look, she only smiled at him. "Anyways, what he's going to be doing is a lot of paperwork he's been skipping out on. He called me to keep you company," she said with a grin. "And I want to go shopping."

"Shopping?" I parroted. I turned my head to look at Reno, who was staring at me with a smirk. "I figured if I couldn't have you, I'd release you to the loving arms of overpriced shoes," he sang. That boy knew me better than I thought he did, it seemed.


	17. Shopping

**SHINRA SHOPPING VILLAGE**

_2 Years Ago_

_Serena Shinra_

I got comfortable in the seat of the small cafe where we'd stopped before daring to begin our purchasing marathon and sipped on a warm mocha something-or-other. It was warm outside and a nice breeze rolled over us, rustling the napkins on all of the outdoor tables softly. Elena was looking over her shoulder at something while simultaneously shaking two packets of sugar. She ripped them open as she turned back around and dumped them into her coffee. She then followed with two creamers and stirred it vigorously, all the while glancing around.

"What are you looking for?" I asked, leaning forward. I lifted a finger to push my sunglasses up on the bridge of my nose, and raised my drink to my lips. "You expecting a _booooy_?" I prodded before taking a drink of my beverage.

Elena rubbed her fingertips together on her thumbs to wipe off sugar granules and gave me a flat look. "No," she answered. "Not all of us have such active love-lives," she reminded me. She gave her coffee a test sip and shook her head with disapproval, then added more sugar.

"I don't understand why you drink it like that if you load it down with all of that crap," I said. Reno drank his coffee black – absolutely black and as hot as the surface of the sun. I knew because I made the mistake of drinking some of his once without putting anything in it, and it was nasty. I didn't know how he did it, so I could understand her reasons behind it, but why didn't she just order something else?

"Habit," she said. "If I get into the routine of ordering some frou-frou drink every time I go anywhere and then we end up on assignment and I'm stuck somewhere with just coffee and the bare essentials, how pissed off do you think I'm gonna be? I'm proactively avoiding my not getting used to it."

"So, you're afraid you'll be without something good later, and you use that as your justification for not having any now?" I asked, puzzled.

"Yes. Wait," she said. She frowned. "When you put it like that it sounds so tragic," she said with a laugh. She cleared her long blonde hair over her shoulder and smiled. "What's with the sudden poetic outbursts? Is someone in _love_?" she teased.

My mouth fell open in genuine surprise. "No," I said matter-of-factly. "I just don't understand why you'd cut yourself off now because potentially later it could not be favourable."

She tapped her short, seashell-painted nails on the table and glared at me. "Okay, not only do I not think we're talking about the same thing, but I think you don't understand what sort of provisions we actually have when we're on assignment. The last time I was in the field for nearly a month with those morons and we all had two hotel rooms a piece. We work for the largest company in the world and your dad has our budget so strangled we literally had to share beds."

"Whose did you share?" I asked her with a smirk.

"Rude, and he _kicks_ in his sleep," she snapped. "I've done well to repress most of those memories, though, so let's just not bring them back up." She ran her fingers through her hair and then shook the thoughts off.

"Your dad's sixtieth birthday is coming up. We all got a memo that there's going to be some huge gala in the museum. You have a dress yet?" she asked. She finally seemed to have gotten her coffee where she needed it to be in order to tolerate drinking it, and did so. Like she ever needed coffee; that girl was usually hyper anyways, but she seemed to thrive on it like plants did sunlight. "He really doesn't look like he's going to be sixty," she mused.

"No, he doesn't most of the time," I agreed. "I think he dyes his hair. And no, I don't have a dress yet. Or a date," I joked.

"What? We're going to be working but we're not going to be like, _working_. I'm sure you can steal Reno for a while," she said with a wave of her hand.

"Ohh, oh no," I said, shaking my head. "Not at my dad's birthday party. Gaia, no," I added.

"_Really?_" she asked incredulously, leaning back in her chair. She narrowed her eyes at me. "Well, what exactly do you keep him around for, then? It seems kind of misleading."

"Okay, wait. _What_?" I said, waving my hands in the air frantically. "Time out. First, why do you care what I do and with who, and second, since when do you care?"

She pressed her lips together. I could see something was bothering her, but I didn't really know what. "Listen," she started. "As much as it doesn't seem like it, I do consider Reno a friend. You know I consider you a friend – I mean, we've known eachother since we were thirteen."

"No, you've known my brother since we were thirteen. You didn't ever talk to me until the birthday where he blew up half of the city," I reminded her. "And that was only because you felt bad for me."

She pointed at me with her mug. "That's not true. I was concerned. You did used to actually like your brother, you know," she reminded me.

I rolled my eyes so hard that it hurt. "Once upon a time," I admitted. "But every year that passed, he got a little more good at disappointing me. That was just when I stopped telling myself he didn't mean to twist the knife."

Elena seemed to hold back a comment as she looked down at her drink for a moment, and then looked back up. "What I mean to say is that you're walking a fine line, here."

I sat there with my mouth open, and then pushed my sunglasses back up over my head, securing my long brown hair back. "You're kidding," I accused. "A fine line? Reno doesn't care about me. He doesn't care about anything except getting his rocks off and being nuttier than a sundae!"

Elena opened her mouth to say something incredibly contrary, I was certain, but her phone rang and she reached for it with a quickness. "Sharp," she answered automatically. She listened for a moment, and then smiled. "Great, thank you. We'll be there in a moment."

She looked up. "Our personal shopper is ready," she announced. She still seemed irritated, a result of coming off of where our conversation had just been going. She let it go, though, and stood up, straightening her jacket. "Are you ready?" she asked with a tilt of her head.

"Yeah, I think so," I replied. I threw my half-empty drink away as we left, walking briskly towards the large plaza that held the wonderful retail within. I really hadn't liked where that had been headed, because there seemed to suddenly have been a strange amount of tension on top of the two of us, and I couldn't figure out why. I mean, why when Elena had only just had confirmation that Reno and I were having a fling did she suddenly decide to begin lecturing me about matters of the heart? It just didn't make sense.

"Do you like, have a thing for him?" I asked her later out of the blue. I was in the middle of two racks of shoes in the back room, a mimosa in one hand and a strawberry in the other. And then, "I can't decide between the open-toed glittery silver ones or the close-toed glittery black ones."

Elena looked up from the long dressing mirror, in the midst of pretending to style her hair with her hands. "For who? Oh, dear lord, if you don't buy the silver ones I will," she confessed. She whirled around, silver cocktail dress clinging to her figure.

"For Reno. You look like a piece of aluminum foil, honey," I warned her. "Despite being pale, you do better in gold. Brown eyes," I reminded her. I reached out and snatched a long, rich midnight blue dress off of the rack and held it up for her to see. It was incredibly pretty; the fabric almost wispy to the touch. The skirt was knee length and then some, layered with the same material, while the bodice was boned and made of silk. "Try this on," I said, thrusting it forward at her.

"Aluminum foil? Ouch," she drawled. She gasped when she saw the dress and practically ripped it out of my hands. "Find me shoes," she commanded. She was already jumping out of one and into the other, while salesmen and women swarmed around her to try and chase down the articles as she tossed them aside. Elena may have seemed nice, but she was vicious when she was hunting for clothing. I'd seen her make salespeople cry.

As she bid them to zip her up, she grabbed at the shoes I held out to her; a simple pair of strapped heels in white. She looked at them funny as she let them dangle in her hands. "White shoes?" she asked, doubt on her face.

"We'll have them dyed to match the dress," I informed her. This seemed to satisfy her and as she put them on, I tried to find something that was less hooker and more grown woman. I passed everything up that was red – no doubt that annoying bitch Scarlet would be wearing it. I rolled my eyes at the dresses as I slid the ones that were red out of the way. Scarlet had been following my father around for years. He'd made her the head of the weapons department because at one point I understood her to be intelligent, but she was a skank. She made no secret of her shameless pursuit of glory and she tried to use my father to do it. She used to hit on him in front of my mother, who was too classy to ever say anything back, but it made me want to knock her teeth out. Unfortunately, doing that could jeopardize things that I didn't understand or have the ability to mend, so I stayed away from the business aspect of everything.

Rufus seemed to know I hated her, and I don't know why he didn't hate her, either. I know that he was always angry when she'd pull her slut routine in front of our mother, too, and for as wild as he was I would have expected him to have done something horrible to her by now. But, nothing from his end. It was like he'd sacrifice his own feelings if it meant keeping me just as miserable as he was. Fucking asshole.

Champagne and orange juice dribbled out of my mouth inelegantly as Elena began yelling at someone about not getting her the jewelry she'd requested fast enough, and I wiped my chin with the back of my hand before turning around. For someone who drank nasty sludge water on the pretense that she didn't want to accommodate her taste buds to the nice stuff and then lose her ability to have access to it, she sure as hell abandoned all of those self-preserving notions when she was in the company of fine garments.

She marched over to me and put her arm out, hand clamping down on the rack as I slid another 'no' along. "Wear white," she said suddenly.

"What?" I squawked. White? "It's a party, not a wedding," I reminded her gently. "White is tacky, anyways. So bright and attention-whorish."

She glared at me. "Really? Really, because I seem to recall a lovely _hot pink_ number a few weeks ago when you had to go to that charity event," she said sarcastically. "Because that's not bright _at all_ or anything." She was still wearing the blue dress, and I was pretty sure that she'd decided on it, which meant that it was really down to me, now. I had hoped we could take longer. Going home was becoming less pleasant since the days counting down to daddy's birthday. Everyone was running around trying to plan everything and they kept asking me like _I_ knew what was supposed to be where. I kept telling them I was just there for punch and pie but the humour was lost to them.

"I don't know..." I trailed off. "The last time we had a huge event, my mother wore a white dress. I don't really think I could pull it off." I was trying every excuse I could think of; that was one of the more personal ones, but no less true. It would cause a stir, and it would run up all of the bad memories we were still struggling to swallow down. Tears, however, tasted too salty to keep in your stomachs forever.

"Serena," she warned, taking me by the shoulders. She shook me. "You're tall. You've got a tan. You're built like a twig. Wear the damn white dress. Forget what everyone else is going to say." She paused. "And you're out of your mind if you think I'm interested in that nutball," she added, her brow furrowed. "I'm just interested in keeping two of my friends _my friends_ in six months or six days or however long it takes for you to get bored."

I jerked back. "Bored? That's not fair!" I shouted, following her between the racks as she grabbed her skirt up and marched for the white dresses.

"Oh, I beg to differ," she countered. She began sliding the dresses back and forth. "No. No. No. Whoa, _no_. No. Maybe. Maybe. Too short. Too short. Too.. puffy." This went on for a while, and each time she hit a 'maybe', she handed it off to a woman standing by to spirit them to a dressing room for me.

"Wait, why? Look, I just don't want to settle down. I don't see you snapping at Reno about all of this. Where's the heart to heart you had with _him_ about crushing my hopes and dreams?" I shot back.

She paused and looked up from her mission. "Oh, it's coming," she assured me. "And Serena, I never said he was going to crush your hopes and dreams," she added.

"No, but you make it sound like I'm going to do that to him," I said, feeling the need to defend myself again. "Why don't you go crusade against Rufus for a while? He's the one who literally made a website to rate the girls he's been with," I snarled.

She stopped again, a final selection in her hands. "Because," she said matter-of-factly, handing the last dress off to someone, "you're better than he is. He's a jerkass and everyone knows it."

"And yet, you still talk to him," I reminded her.

"For the love of Gaia, Serena! You're eager to drag him into this so that you're losing sight of the actual conversation!"

"Argument," I corrected her. I began stripping down, going towards the first room. She followed right after me, shrill voice still going.

"And for the record, Rufus doesn't act like that to me, and it isn't for his lack of trying. I just shut that shit down pretty quickly and he hasn't tried it since," she snapped. "I don't feed into it like you do. My god, you two seriously are like two peas in a pod," she exclaimed, making a strangling motion with her hands and baring her teeth at me.

My head snapped around, long brown hair nearly whipping back to slap me on the cheek. "We are nothing alike," I warned her. "If you seriously think that, then you need to get your head checked." I yanked on the dress in silence after that, and she went to the far side of the room. She was really making me _mad_. I couldn't believe how fast this had gone downhill.

"All I'm saying is that you shouldn't fool around because you want to piss him off," Elena concluded, her voice firm.

I was mad, but what she said held water. I liked Reno, I did – but a lot of what I did was obvious because it made Rufus angry. Partially because I got away with it under our father's nose (and honestly, even if I had gotten caught he probably wouldn't have cared – hell, he probably already knew, somehow), but a lot of it was because Reno and Rufus were friends and I deliberately wanted to cause him pain by taking them away from him. Wrong? Absolutely. Would I continue to take them all, one by one? I didn't know, but I'd dame sure tried in the past. I'd succeeded, too, a lot of the time. That was what Elena meant when she said 'bored', but she didn't want to outright accuse me of sabotaging Rufus like that. It was a pretty heavy thing to say to the daughter of President Shinra, regardless of our friendship.

"What do you think?" I asked, turning for her to to see the dress. I held my arms out at my sides, looking at the other mirrors and trying to decide if I liked it. It was strapless gown made with nylon organza, with a layered skirt that had the faintest ruffling. The material was gathered at the seam, the impression of rouching apparent but not so obvious that it was gaudy. It was a simple bodice and a floor-length skirt. It was incredibly plain, but...

"That's the one," she said, her eyes approving. She nodded, and I knew she was going to accept that I wasn't going to address her concerns any further, so she looked shocked when I did.

"Elena, I appreciate what you're saying. I do like Reno. He's fun. He's crazy, but he's fun. And I think he can take care of himself where this is concerned. I'm sure Rufus has told him all sorts of bad shit about me, so I'm positive he's aware that this isn't permanent. I'm also very sure that I won't fall in love with him tomorrow if I suddenly decided not to hate my brother. It's complicated, but I promise, I'm not trying to purposely run him into the ground. Hell, if he doesn't lay off the drunk flying, he might do it to me, first," I added with a snort.

"Okay," she acknowledged. "That's all I wanted to hear. Hey, what do you think if I cut my hair off to about here?" she asked, turning and holding her hair up to about her chin.

I looked up, horrified. "You do it and I'll kill you in your sleep," I swore to her. "Next thing you'll tell me you want shoulder pads for your blouse jackets," I muttered to myself, holding my arms up as the team of assistants got me out of that dress. I could hear her chucking and she raised her glass to me through the folds of fabric I could see between.

"I was kidding," she assured me. "And I will never, ever ask for power shoulder clothing. I promise."


	18. RUFUS VOICEMAIL ONE

**SHINRA PENTHOUSE**

_Rufus Shinra_

_Present Day_

_You have **seven** new voicemails and **one** saved message_

_To listen to your messages, press **6**_

_To delete your messages, press **4**_

_To save your messsages, press **7**_

_To return to the main menu, press **#**_

_**6**_

_Received at **3:14 AM** from **Unknown Number**_

"_It's Elena. You need to call me back when you get this."_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have **six **new messages_

_**6**_

_Received at **3:47 AM **from **Unknown Number**_

"_Rufus, this is an emergency. Please, call me back."_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have –_

_**6**_

_Received at **4:02 AM **from **Unknown Number**_

"_Rufus, please? Please?"_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have - _

_**6**_

_Received at **4:59 AM** from **Unknown Number**_

"_Goddamnit, don't do this, Rufus. Tell me where they are! PLEASE, don't do this!"_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have **three** new -_

_**6**_

_Received at **5:14 AM **from **Unknown Number**_

"_It's me. It's done. Just for the record, this will be the last thing I ever do for you. I don't owe you any more favours, so don't ask."_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have **two** - _

_**6**_

_Received at **5:29 AM **from **Unknown Number**_

"_It's Tseng, I got your message. I'll have everyone out and on Cloud's trail by noon. I'm having trouble finding Elena and Reno. If you know where they are, that would be good."_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have **one** - _

_**6**_

_Received at **6:48 AM** from **Unknown Number**_

"_Tseng again. Collected Reno, but he's not in any shape for flying. He's so drunk he doesn't know where he is right now, so we're going to experience a delay. I still can't find Elena, but I think that's something to do with the news. You should... probably turn on the TV. And you might want to be sitting down when you do it."_

_**4**_

_Message deleted._

_You have **no** new voicemails and **one** saved message. _

_To listen to your messages, press **6**_

_**6**_

_Saved message received on **yesterday** at **8:32 PM** from **Serena**_

"_Hey, it's me. I've stalled the funeral for as long as I can, so I'm going to have to go in now. I'll be home as soon as it's over. I've got some things I need to tell you... some things I've been meaning to tell you for a long time. Just... I'll be home as fast as I can."_


	19. Lost and Found

**FAIR HOUSEHOLD; KALM**

_Present Day_

_Violet Fair_

I had decided to go with them, and so I returned to my home to pack a few things. I wanted very badly to take Zack with me, but I knew that would have been a bad decision. There were a lot of issues that we were running into, and I didn't entirely trust myself to keep him safe, so I had contacted Zack's parents to come and house-sit while I was gone. I sat down on my bed and opened the drawer to my bedside table, pulling out a plain wooden brown box. Slowly, I opened the box, gazing down at what lay nestled before me in little burrows made from sitting for so long.

The balls were small enough to fit in the palm of my hand, and surprisingly light. One was green, and cool to the touch as I lifted it from its rightful place. The next was warm, while the third made my hand feel a gentle buzzing sensation. Below the initial row of three, there were more, the uses of which I was not entirely certain. I always had a good feel for materia; it was one of the reasons Zack and I had even met as children. My mother worked in a small materia shop and I often assisted her. Zack liked to come in and look at them, and so we spoke often of their uses, although the conversations weren't nearly as educated then as they could have been now. The bottom three had also been things that had been delivered to me from Zack's parents, and until now I could not bear to even look at them.

The first I picked up and rolled around in between my hands, trying to determine its purpose. I didn't feel anything from it at all; it was as though it had literally caused my knowledge to wall up. The second was not green at all, but a harsh red colour, and it seemed to glow from the inside. When I picked it up, I didn't get anything from it, but I hadn't expected to. I hadn't thought I'd ever come into possession of a summoning materia, and so it didn't surprise me that I couldn't get a good feel for it. The third was green, but violently shifting in its read as I held it in my hand. There was a brief pause of nothingness, and then it was blinding; a searing pain that came suddenly and assaulted all of my senses. It hit me so hard that I dropped it, and it rolled under the bed before I could stop the damn thing. I ended up having to fish it out with a shoe, because it continued to keep its 'mood' and that didn't make me inclined to hold it any closer than I had been.

I knew they had said they had plenty, especially of the healing variety, but I wanted to be certain that I was useful to them. I felt bad about coming along; it was obvious that Cloud and Tifa had never fully reconciled, and it made me a little uncomfortable. I didn't talk much and that seemed to bother Barret, who I heard asking Tifa why she never mentioned me and if I had something to hide. Tifa, bless her heart, told him to stuff it. Evidently there was still such a thing as privacy and personal business, and I was thankful that she recognized it. I didn't want them all to know my history; that Tifa knew would be bad enough. Cloud didn't seem to recognize me at all. He did, but he didn't. It was hard to explain, but there was... an emptiness in his eyes I didn't recall seeing before. Evidently he'd made SOLDIER after all of the things that happened. I supposed that was his penance for killing Sephiroth, but I hadn't been interested in hanging around to re-live the story of our home being torched, and so that was when I took my leave.

Zack came from his room and into mine, zipping along so fast I almost didn't have time to put the materia I'd been collecting away. "What's that mommy?" he asked, ethereal blue eyes wide with curiosity.

"Just something very special mommy is going to take with her," I answered.

"What is it, though?" he pressed. It was difficult to deter him once he saw a topic he needed information on. Like father, like son, I supposed.

"Well, it's for using magic," I explained. I patted the bed next to where I sat and put the box between us. I opened it up again so that he could see it better, watching the colours as they lit up his face like a glow of Solstice lights.

"This one is pretty," he said, reaching for the red one. Before I could stop him, he'd taken it out of the box and held it gently in his two hands. "Mommy, it's amazing!" he exclaimed suddenly. He held it up so that I could see what he was talking about.

I leaned forward, brows furrowing as I tried to understand what he meant. "I don't see anything," I said slowly. "Do you see something?" I looked at it more closely, but he shook his head.

"I see it in my head," he said. He placed it in my hands and closed them over it. "Don't you?"

I exhaled slowly, trying to get a feel for how he said he'd seen it in his head. Was the materia communicating with him somehow? I closed my eyes, my son's hands over my own, and tried very hard to empty my head out for a moment and just _feel_. I got the sensation of flight, of love, and of freedom. A small red bird drifted across the black of my mind, but a wisp of smoke in the darkness.

"What does it mean?" he asked, searching my face for answers.

I opened my mouth to respond, but then the sudden shock of life being snuffed out rippled through me and I struggled not to cry out. The materia was not done "speaking", and briefly there was a feeling of utter loss and sadness. Then, there was a flicker of something – the spark of life, and the sensation of a rich explosion of existence and light filled my head. It was incredibly abstract, and I struggled to find a way to explain it – and I failed.

"I'm not sure, baby," I said hesitantly. I took it from him, examining it more closely. Because I had received them and promptly put them in the case with the materia I had, I had no idea how long he'd had it. It didn't stop me from feeling suddenly incredibly upset that somehow I'd ended up with a piece of him that punctuated so accurately my feelings; my situation, almost.

"You look sad, mommy," my son warned. He'd taken the ice materia from the case and was rolling it around on my bedspread. Zack was aware, in his five year old way, that his father had become part of the Lifestream. He knew that his father was a hero and that he loved him very much. He only knew Zack had died before he was born, though – I wasn't up to explaining our very complex history to a child just yet. Perhaps when he was older.

"I know," I said, a wan smile on my lip. "I need to go with these people for a while," I admitted. "I need to help them to find out more about daddy, and to stop a very bad man from hurting a lot of people." It felt odd to say it like that – but my thoughts of Sephiroth were cryptic as of late. The more I learned every day, the less and more I equally understood.

"But I don't want you to go," he said, his lip quivering.

"I don't want to go, either, but this is something I need to do," I said. "I won't be gone long, though. And you'll get to stay with Grandma and Grandpa for a while," I promised. "They're excited to have you."

"Yeah..." he trailed off. He had scooted closer to me, and I responded by swinging my legs onto the bed and enveloping him into an embrace as I stretched out.

"Do you want to keep the red magic until I come back?" I asked him, hoping that offer would bring him some comfort.

He nuzzled against me and looked at the materia. I'd set it back down, unwilling to relive that sensation over and over again. "Yeah..." he said. He looked up at me. "Mommy," he began – and right there, I knew it was trouble. He was using a very specific tone he always reserved for questions of a difficult calibur that I would have to answer on the fly and then spend a lifetime thinking about what I should have said.

"Mommy," he said again, "did daddy give you this? Is that why it makes you sad?"

Couldn't get anything past this kid. "Kind of," I admitted. "I got it after he passed away. Your Grandma gave it to me. She thought he wanted me to have it."

He fell into silence, picking it up holding the ball to his chest. He seemed somehow comforted by this fact that the item was his father's, and was content to bask in its soft, glowing warmth for a while longer. To be honest, I was worried that it would upset him, but for some reason, he did not seem to 'see' what I had seen, and rather only felt the sensation of warmth and life that the red globe exuded. I could not explain why it didn't show him more; I had often wondered if materia was sentient somehow, and I had been told that the red materia was the most volatile kind – and the most powerful. I was apprehensive about allowing him to hang on to it, but somehow I felt as though I needed to.

"Are you done packing?" he asked, looking around the room. I had a very small kit prepared, and all that remained were the magics that rested in their case. I had no weapon to speak of aside from them, but I hoped that would not discount my usefulness to the group. They had never seen me work magic, so they had no reason to believe I could bring anything to the table, but I was willing to prove my worth if it meant getting answers for the great crimes that had been committed in the past.

"I think I am," I said after I ran a mental inventory of what I had left to do. It didn't consist of much; Zach's parents were due in Kalm within a few hours, and so I really needed only sleep before we departed the next day.

"Then, can I stay with you for a while?" he asked. He had been very careful these last few days; we had run into a lot of trouble, and his rambunctious nature had been temporarily subdued in favour of trying not to make our lives difficult. I was eternally grateful for my son's sudden calm streak, but at the same time it saddened me to know he was losing bits of his childhood because of a selfish quest I was on.

"Of course," I replied, hugging him tightly. "Mommy's tired though. Do you want to take a nap with me?"

Generally speaking, naptime was the equivalent of doom to my son. He fought sleep at every chance he got as though he were a knight trying to slay a dragon. He literally would find new avenues daily to maintain his consciousness, and once I had even caught him eating spoonfuls of sugar racked on the belief that sugar made him stay awake. All it got him was an upset stomach, but he was not to be deterred. When he just nodded and curled up beside me, the red materia clutched to his chest, I realized that what lay ahead of me was nothing compared to what was before me.


	20. Confessions

**KALM INN**

_Present Day_

_Violet Fair_

It was late when I got to the inn. Zack's parents had arrived and dropped their things off at the house. They had been saving for a trip to the Golden Saucer for months now, and though they had agreed to watch the house for me, and Zachary along with it, they felt that the best way to get his mind off of the immediate situation was to take him along. They had left only hours before, and because I had slept soundly during the nap I had taken, I was wide awake. It didn't seem to matter that it was nearly midnight by now, but I couldn't stay in that empty house alone.

I had tried to ask Zack's mother about the three materias that I had been left with, but she couldn't give me any information. She told me that Zack had kept all three rather guarded because of their potency, but she was never told what any of them did, and she honestly preferred not to know. She was rather against the idea of magic as a whole, it seemed, though she didn't say it in so many words. I appreciated the fact that she didn't question me much about where I was going. That I single-handedly raised my child with very little financial support from the outside and did it without complaint seemed to sit well with her, and so she only indicated that I needed to do what I needed to do for a while. I believe she knew that I had (very obvious) unresolved issues; things I didn't deal with because I didn't have the time, and I supposed that she agreed it was necessary now that I did. She didn't know that I was embarking on a potentially deadly journey to stop the man who was responsible for all of my strife to begin with – she might not have been as willing to assist me if she had.

I had tried to go back to sleep very briefly after they had departed, but it was difficult. I had horrible nightmares most nights; flashbacks, almost, to that night in Nibelheim and the days leading up to it. There had been a lot of dark energy swirling about during that time, and I felt like a tiny bird caught in a hurricane throughout all of it. To make matters worse, my dreams seemed to have taken on a new aggression and assaulted me more regularly. I had thought that I had gotten rid of them for a while, but they had come back with renewed force a few months prior – and then, of course, I had contacted Tifa and run into Cloud, and I realized that it had to be connected, somehow.

Something else bothered me about the nightmares. They had become... more realistic. As though they weren't dreams, but that I was actually living in the small moments that occurred during parts where I wasn't just watching. They were becoming interactive, in a way, and they were beginning to gnaw at my grasp of reality. I shifted on the couch of the inn, wrapping the blanket more firmly around my shoulders as I tried to push the thoughts back down into the bottle where I tried to tightly seal them.

Just then, a soft voice came from my left. "Are you feeling okay?"

I jumped, my hand to my chest, and then relaxed just as quickly. "Aeris," I breathed. "Has anyone ever told you that you don't make a sound when you move?"

She shrugged a little and gave me a bright grin. "No, but I'd say it's a useful talent to have if it's true. Mind if I keep you company? Someone up there is snoring and it's driving me nuts," she confessed.

I drew my legs in on the couch and opened up the blanket for her to share. Really, it was ridiculously large, and so we both sat comfortably at either end of the couch facing eachother, our feet tucked beneath us. We were cozy, and for a while neither of us said much at all, preferring to enjoy the company of another person. Aeris somehow had the ability to make me feel... safe was almost the word I would choose to use, but it wasn't so much that as something I didn't feel I could describe with words. Safe was close, though, and I felt it was fair. She may not have been physically intimidating, but there were other ways someone could make you feel protected.

"So," she pressed. "Are you okay? You looked like you were a million miles away when I came up. I was actually there for a few seconds before you noticed me," she admitted.

"Yeah," I said softly. "I just..." and I left my statement open, because I wasn't sure how much I was willing to delve into. I was desperate to tell someone about the nightmares, but I was fearful that I would be labeled as crazy and that I would be deemed a liability if I had.

"If you don't feel like talking, I understand," she told me. "You've had a rough day. Has Zack ever been gone before?"

"Well, he's stayed overnight at a friend's house once or twice, but when his grandparents and he visit, it's usually because we've gone there or he's come here. I just worry," I confessed. "It's hard for me to let him out of my sight. I'm sure you know the story, now," I said.

Aeris nodded slightly. "Cloud filled us in. I'm so terribly sorry for what you've had to endure, Violet. I can't imagine how hard it's been. But we're going to get through this, and I think it will help," she added. She nudged my foot with her own. "I'll make sure you get back to him."

Her words of reassurance warmed my heart in a way I could not have fathomed before then. In fact, it drew tears to my eyes, but they were a result of mixed emotions. I felt grateful to have her as a friend, but I also was terribly worried that I would somehow fail them.

"Violet?" she asked softly. She waited for me to compose myself, patient as I looked away and wiped my eyes, then physically pushed down the emotions I was feeling. "Is there something else? I don't mean to pry, I just... Look, if you want to talk about anything, I won't tell anyone. I just want to help make sure you're okay." She smiled. "Well, I know that you're okay, but you know what I mean."

I looked down at the blanket for a while, and then took a shaky breath. "There are going to be parts of the story Cloud left out," I confessed. "Because they are things that nobody knows. Things that I have carried with me for all of this time, and I have felt as though lately the knowledge has been trying to take shape in my dreams and break me in two. Literally, it feels as though my own mind is trying to fight with itself," I explained.

"Why?" Aeris asked. She looked interested, but it was in a concerned way, not in the way that someone did when they were about to hear a good story.

"Guilt, I suppose," I guessed. "I feel a strong sense of responsibility for what happened in Nibelheim, despite the fact that I was only sixteen at the time."

"But how?" she countered, her brow arched. "You were as much a victim as anyone else was. It's fortunate you made it out alive, or who knows what could have happened to you?"

I fell intensely quiet at her questions, but only because she asked me what I asked myself so many times. I always came up with the same answers, though. You couldn't change the past. "It wasn't fortune, Aeris. Sephiroth is the only reason that I am still alive; he is the reason why my son is alive."

Aeris tilted her head, but said nothing. She waited for me to continue, but she did move a little closer to me, sitting up and angling her body so that she was more alert.

I took a very deep, shaking breath. I felt that block coming up my throat, that thing that stopped me from confessing my sins to the world. My lips trembled a little, and I felt my stomach twist in a knot as the words fell out of my mouth, unwilling and hollow. "I talked to him when Zack wasn't around. I felt like I shouldn't have been, so I didn't tell him. It was the only thing I ever hid from him. Maybe if I hadn't..." I broke off.

"Hey," Aeris said firmly. "It doesn't matter. From what I understand of Sephiroth, he really came out of left field with a lot of this. You couldn't have known what he was going to do."

"But I did," I protested. "I knew. He didn't have to say it directly, but what he said to me -" I choked off the last words, feeling dizzy from the pressure building up in my head. My chest was pounding and I felt like I was crying, but no tears were falling. It was just that strangling sensation on my throat, the burning on my lips.

"Honey, we really don't have to talk about this if you can't do it," Aeris interrupted me gently. She leaned forward and grabbed my hands, as though to ground me. "I'm serious. This is obviously really big and maybe you're just not ready to tell it, yet."

"No," I said, shaking my head. I took my hands back from her, crossing my arms tightly. "I need to tell someone, before it drives me crazy. I just need to think," I said, trying to buy myself time to calm down before she called the conversation off.

"Okay," she said, but it was clear that she was more worried about me than about what I had to say. The fact that she was interested in what I needed to tell her but not hounding me to do it was something I was thankful for. If it had been anyone else – even Tifa – there would have been a demand for me to tell them everything, right then, no matter the cost to my sanity.

Once I'd been able to bring myself back down to reality, I took another shaky breath. "Okay," I said softly.

"Okay?" she asked in return, as though to say, 'Are you sure?'

I nodded, and she leaned back a little, relaxing. "Anyways, as I was saying – I would talk to him sometimes when nobody was around. Or, he would talk to me. It was strange. He had a... a pull, like a gravitational force to him. I thought Zack had been kidding when he'd told me about it, but it was real. He seemed aware and unaware at the same time, as though... as though he had been put in a position he didn't know how adapt to, but when push came to shove he knew how to work the controls. He was very... manipulative. But it wasn't in a bad way – he could draw you in without realizing it, because I don't think he realized it most of the time."

"That's a lot of what Cloud said," she offered, informing me that evidently I was not the only person who could see these things about Sephiroth. "But he at no point indicated he didn't know he was doing it. I guess that's the difference between adoration and mere presence," she muttered.

"It is," I agreed. "I didn't idolize Sephiroth. He terrified me. From the first moment he took my hand in greeting to the last moment we saw eachother, there was a large part of me that felt as though I was exposed to him somehow. Other people seemed to just drift around in his presence and they were his pawns. Whether they felt it or not, they bent to his will. They scrambled over themselves to seek his approval, even if they said it was friendship. I watched Zack do it," I added. "But I could see it; I could smell it on him when he came through the door. He looked at me, and it was like he looked through me. Like... like we were walking around in the dark and only he was lit up – but because I knew, it lit me up, too. It singled me out, somehow."

"So he was on to you?" she asked carefully.

"But he wasn't," I explained. "He was, but he didn't... it's hard to convey. It's like when you take a cookie from the stove when your mother tells you not to. Even though she's in the next room, she knew you were doing it, and even though you do it anyways and she doesn't see you, she still knows – but she doesn't say anything to you."

"Because she figures I'll confess eventually," Aeris reasoned.

"Exactly. And that was what was the most chilling of all of it. It was as though he knew that at some point, the conversation would take place. Like he knew that I would be unable to stay away. So, now go back to the day after the team comes back from the reactor," I said, drawing back to the story.

"Okay," Aeris said. "So, he wouldn't come out of his room and the rest of the people who had been with him just... waited," she said, setting up the scene.

"Right. Zack even tried to talk to him. He got the door slammed in his face, actually, as did everyone else. My grandfather forced me to go up there and bring him something to eat, because he wouldn't come down, and my grandfather was kind of old-fashioned. So, I went to his room after the rest of the group had gone out to see their friends and families. We were literally the only two people on the second story. It was – I was really nervous.

"I debated on knocking on his door, and then I decided that I'd just leave the food for him and he could get it whenever he decided to come out. I figured that I'd still _brought_ it to him, so I was absolved of my responsibility. If he didn't open the door, it was his own fault – and I could avoid becoming a target for abuse because he was feeling reclusive. So, I knelt down and set the tray down as carefully as I could, but right as I stood up, he yanked the door open.

"I just stared at him. I didn't know what else I could do. He asked me what I was doing and I told him I'd brought him food. He just looked at it, then gestured with his head for me to come in. I stood in the hallway because I was frozen with panic, but he turned around and said, 'Well?'. So, I took the food and went in. I set it down on the table and then tried to leave, but he shut the door just as I got to it. When I turned around, he was leaning over me, one arm still up on the door."

Aeris' face changed – it was a sort of fear and apprehension reserved for a specific sort of pain, and I shook my head before she could go any further. "Nothing like that," I promised her.

"Oh, thank the goddess," she whispered.

"He just... began asking me questions. Now, at the time, I really thought that I was about to get attacked. All I could think was that there was no way I was going to get out of that room alive. I couldn't tell you why I felt like prey, but when you stood before him in close quarters like that, you didn't have any other choice."

"What did he ask you? I mean, why did he need to ask you questions at all?" she asked.

"You're as confused as I was. I still don't know. He asked me about Zack and I, as though he was trying to understand our dynamic. He asked about my parents, too. A lot of questions about relationships – like he was trying to learn about them."

"But Cloud said he had friends and the like," Aeris interjected.

"He did. Zack considered Sephiroth very close. Evidently Sephiroth had a lot of personality – but right then, all I saw was a man who had a bad disconnect somewhere along the way. And then he asked me what would happen to me if I lost my parents. I told him that I would be devastated, but that I felt like they had lived their lives, and as long as they went peacefully than I couldn't fight it. He asked then what I would do if I lost Zack, and I just... froze."

"Why would he ask you that?" Aeris said, shocked and irritated. "That's not something you just say to someone."

"Heh, well. Sephiroth was at the point with me where he felt like he could say whatever he wanted and I wouldn't fight back. I realized that he had been manipulating me the entire time that he'd met me – he had been waiting for the right moment to use my ability to read people against me. I don't know if it was to hurt me, or if it was to show me that he couldn't be read, to prove a point. Anyways, when he asked me that, I didn't know what to say. It was literally unfathomable to me. I was very scared of losing Zack in the SOLIDER program, so I just didn't think about it. I made it _not_ an option, and that worked for me."

"I wish I had that frame of mind," Aeris commented lightly.

"Don't. It will creep up on you," I warned her. "And he knew that he'd caught me off guard with the question, too. He went to the window and sat down on the bench in front of it. I had felt weakness in my knees and so I sat down on the edge of his bed, face stuck in some kind of shocked facial expression.

"He prompted me after a few moments of silence. 'Violet', he said. 'Violet, what would you do if something happened to Zack?' And when I looked up, he was staring at me with his big, bright green eyes. Aeris, you can hear people describe his eyes, but you would need to see them to understand the full scope of the way they could just bore into you.

"Finally, I looked up at him and I said that it would break my heart. He narrowed his eyes a little, which I took to mean that he wanted a real answer. With a shaky voice, I had to basically dictate my worst fear to him. I told him that I'd probably just... fade away. I'd stop eating. I'd stop sleeping. I'd cry until I was so dehydrated no tears would come, and then I wouldn't drink anything because I wanted to feel physical pain to alleviate the mental pain. I told him that I'd wither and die, like a flower with no sun, no water, and no warmth."

"Violet..." Aeris began slowly.

"No, I know. It's fine. And anyways, he just said, 'It wouldn't have to be that way'," I responded.

"What does that even mean?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.

"He got up and came over to me, and just told me that it wouldn't have to be that way. He told me that no matter what happened, I would have a part of him with me. He motioned for me to stand, and so I did, and he walked me to the door. I could feel his hand was shaking, and I could feel his muscles tensing to try and stop it. When I turned to tell him that it was going to be okay, he let go of my hand and knelt down a little.

" 'Leave, Violet,' he said. I said that I was trying to, and he shook his head. 'Leave this town. If you want to keep him with you always, you will pack your things and you will leave. There will be a time when he slips away into the darkness, and that night you will need to be ready. You will need to leave and you cannot look back. Can you promise me this?'"

"I was terrified. I tried to ask him why, and he wouldn't answer me. He just took my hands and told me to leave if I wanted to keep Zack with me. And then he leaned in and kissed me. It wasn't a harsh kiss – he leaned in and paused, waiting to see what I was going to do. When I just stood there, staring at him with wide eyes, trying to process what was happening, he closed the remaining gap and brushed his lip against mine. I felt like it was poison; my lips were burning where his had touched them. I didn't dare move, though, not until he let my hands go."

"What did you do, then?" Aeris asked, incredibly disgusted by the idea of the kiss.

"Oh, I ran. I ran out of there so fast I didn't close the door behind me. I was sixteen, Aeris. I didn't know anything. I just knew that someone had told me to run if I wanted to save Zack's life, and that was what I was going to do. I saw Zack later on, and I burst into tears when he came over to see how I was doing. I couldn't tell him anything that had happened. I passed it off as something else, but inside, it was aching in my chest, ripping and clawing to get out. I wanted to gather him and flee together, but I knew he'd never run. He wasn't a coward."

"But you aren't a coward," Aeris protested. "If you hadn't have left, you would have been killed, and so would..." she trailed off. "Oh," she said slowly.

"You understand what I didn't even know, at the time," I told her with a knowing look. "I don't know how, but he knew I was already pregnant. I had no reason to suspect I was, honestly. I was stupid enough to believe that running away was going to save Zack's life. And it did, but it wasn't what I thought. He tricked me."

"But if you knew what was going to happen, you wouldn't have run?" she asked.

"Not on your life. I would have done everything in my power to save him. Maybe I would have died. Maybe none of them would have. The point is, he took the choice from me."

"Violet, he saved the life of your son, if nothing else," she reminded me gently.

"I know." I whispered it, because it was still hard to grasp. "I know. But he took the life of his father, and of almost everyone else. What does that mean? Why did he let me go?"

"I don't know, honey," Aeris said. She moved over to my side and wrapped her arm around me, allowing me to rest my head on her shoulder. "But you're both alive, and your son is beautiful and smart and you're a good mother. If that's the last act of mercy Sephiroth ever had, it was a good one," she said softly.

I couldn't help it. I started to cry. "I just keep dreaming about it over and over. I keep replaying it in my head, thinking that I could have stopped him somehow," I sobbed. "I knew. I knew what was going to happen. I had a chance right there in that room, maybe to talk him down off the ledge, and all I did was make him want to go further down the rabbit hole. How is that possibly something I can cope with?"

"You didn't _make_ him do anything," Aeris said firmly. She straightened me out with her hands on my shoulders. "Violet, I promise. If anything, you allowed him a small reverence for life and an actual use for the very small bit of humanity he had left. I swear to you Violet, if anything you did, to the man that was inside him before he was lost to the insanity, you were one last lifeline."

That was the entire problem, though. There was still more I wasn't telling her. I just nodded, hugging her tightly, trying to forget everything behind me and failing. The truth that was still covered was that in my dreams, he spoke to me. He told me things that – things that I couldn't possibly know to dream. He was slowly dragging me down, driving me crazy, because I _was_ that lifeline that he'd needed. He needed to kill the past in order to move into the future – and Cloud, Tifa and I? We were his past. He was going to kill us all.


	21. Travels

**Costa del Sol**

_Present Day_

_Violet Fair_

"_You owe me, Violet," he said harshly. He had both of his hands on either side of me, and was leaning down in such a way that he stood over me – literally – he caused me to look up as his form made a small arc over my body. _

_I was scared, but I forced myself to stay in control. "I don't owe you anything," I snarled. "You chose to let me go. You took everything from me, and now you think I owe you? You're not crazy, you're stupid."_

_Sephiroth's eyes widened for a moment, and then he grabbed me by the arms and slammed me against the door so hard that I screamed. We were back in that room in the inn, and I was helpless and frozen and alone. He leaned next to my ear and spoke, holding me up off of the ground tightly. My feet dangled below me, and I kicked them uselessly before he squeezed me into submission._

"_I took almost everything from you. I left you one thing, and if you don't play nicely, I'll take that, too," he promised. _

"_Please," I whispered. "Please don't."_

"_Then be a good girl and do as I say," he hissed. He dropped me so suddenly that I screamed. The impact physically hurt, and I struggled to stand, but I found the room starting to spin as he stood over me, waiting._

I woke up very suddenly, Cloud standing over me. "Violet?" he asked. He was kneeling down next to me, and I was on the floor, blankets tangled around my feet. I must have been suspended in the net for some time before they finally worked loose – I could see that I'd fallen out of my bed now, but I was still coming off of the dream. I realized I was covered in sweat, and ran my shaking hands through my blonde hair, trying to give myself a second to come back to reality.

"Hey," he said softly. "You were having a really bad dream. I heard you from the next room," he informed me. He helped me up, waiting as I stumbled a bit, and then stood while I sat back down on the bed, cooling off.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm just a little stressed out after the ship," I confessed. "It'll never be too long before I see him again," I said of Sephiroth. His voice gave me a chill I couldn't control, and I shivered in spite of the warm room.

"Tell me about it," he muttered. He looked at me, and then said, "You were saying, 'Please, don't' in your sleep – over and over again, actually. To the point where you were yelling. Is there... anything you want to talk to me about?" he ventured.

I looked at my lap. "I had a dream that someone was trying to hurt my son," I said in a low voice. It was a half-truth, but it would have to do. "I was begging them not to, but it didn't really seem to matter."

Cloud nodded. "I'm sorry that you have to experience that. I know you've got a lot to lose Violet; so does Barret, in that regard. But we're going to protect you – we're going to protect eachother. We'll see this through and then we can get you back home to him."

"I appreciate it, Cloud," I responded. "I miss him all the time. It's hard, but I just keep telling myself that it's only going to be a few weeks." I smiled a little. "He's probably having a ball at the Saucer anyways."

"How long were they supposed to be there for?" Cloud asked. "Didn't you say a week?"

"Yeah, or thereabout. He wanted to go to that place crazy bad; thank Gaia that they're taking him. I don't know if I could deal with all of the noise," I said with a small laugh. I was beginning to feel a lot better now, thankful that Cloud had been there to bring me out of the haze instead of having to go through it alone.

He got a faraway sort of look in his bright blue eyes. "He really... really looks like Zack," he added softly. "It's almost... hard for me to look at him. He has his eyes, you know. Mako eyes. If Shinra found out that he existed..." he trailed off. "I can't think of anyone in SOLDIER who had children. The program does pretty well at cutting you off from the world, so while I don't discount they exist, I would have assumed that Shinra would have taken... steps."

"I know what you're saying, Cloud. Luckily, on the books, I'm dead. I know that sounds bad, but nobody save you and Tifa know I'm alive. Zack's parents do, but Shinra doesn't care about them. They moved to Gongaga after Zack joined SOLDIER, and they're not on the radar as far as I can tell. As far as Shinra is concerned, I don't exist, and neither does he." It was a chilling thing to admit, but it was one that had crossed my mind before.

"That's good," he breathed. "But still, we'll be careful about your communication with him. I'll figure out a good way to do it for you that won't connect you to us." He put his hand on my shoulder and nodded. "We're going to head down to the beach. Tifa's already there, but she told me to come tell you when you got up. So now you're awake, and I'm telling you. See you in a while?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said. "And thanks... it's always really hard waking up from those things. I'm glad you were close," I told him.

"Hey," he said, pausing at the door with the knob in his grasp. "I have them to. I know how it feels." And he nodded and left me to myself, closing the door behind him.

I flopped back onto the bed and let out a long sigh. When we'd been on the cargo ship, Sephiroth had been there. Only, it didn't feel like him. He'd looked right at me – _right_ at me. I couldn't get a read off of him, not like I had before. I always flickered back to the vision of him in his room, looking at me and desperately making me promise to run. I felt myself trying to find that version of him, but it wasn't there. It wasn't that it was lost; it simply was _gone_. All that was left was a thing, a shell of a man, and he sure was motivated to hold us back.

I forced the thoughts out of my head, unwilling to think about it any further. We had survived against the monster he'd left for us to destroy, and we were still on our way. We were several steps behind him, and we'd just have to deal with that for the time being. I got up and turned on the television, desperate for some sort of background noise that I could have to drone out my own problems.

I went into the bathroom and cleaned up, then pulled my swimsuit out of the shower where I'd hung it to dry. We'd all bought them in the hotel shop the night before, and I suddenly felt eager to feel the warmth of the sun and water and sand. I came back out of the bathroom, hands working a braid into my blonde hair, and stopped in front of the television. It was on a news channel, reporting about the recent events.

"We go live to Maria Branford, who's live on the scene with more details. Maria?"

"Thanks, Tom. I stand here in the hall of the Shinra penthouse, one of the most prestigious locations in all of Midgar City. Inside, the officials are investigating the sudden and tragic death of Serena Shinra. The coroner's reports say it was a single bullet to the back of the head, done execution style, and they have placed her time of death on Thursday around 6 AM. It was the day after her father's funeral, and the day before her brother's inauguration to become the president. President Shinra was not available for any comments at his time, but our thoughts here at SHN-5 are with him in his time of need.

"The company has marked this as another terrorist attack by the group known as AVALANCHE, along with the untimely murder of our former president this past Tuesday. If you know anything or have any information at all that could lead to the capture of the terrorists, please contact Shinra officials at the number on the bottom of the screen. Back to you, Tom."

"Well, it's a very sad day here for us in Midgar City. Serena's memorial will be held on Saturday at 4 PM on the front steps of the city hall. She was twenty-four," he concluded. "After this break, how safe is _your_ drinking water? Shinra City officials give these tip for ensuring you're protected."

I turned off the set wordlessly. I knew that Cloud and Tifa and their friends hadn't killed either of those people, but the heat coming off of it would be bad. Rufus would use it as a campaign to hunt them down if he could help it. I got changed and ran outside, dropping down in the sand next to Tifa.

"Serena Shinra is dead," I gasped, tired from running the gauntlet of sand down to the shore.

Tifa's head snapped up so fast she almost fell out of her chair. "What?" she barked. She whipped her sunglasses off and then lowered her voice. "How can you be sure? And why?"

"It's all over the news," I said. "This is bad, Tifa. Really bad. They're blaming AVALANCHE."

"How did she die? We know the president was killed by Sephiroth, but his daughter... She was a socialite. She wasn't really connected to the company. I mean, Rufus is still alive..." she trailed off.

"A single bullet to the back of the head," I responded. "It wasn't him. But if she was so unimportant, why would someone want to kill her?" I asked. "It seems so senseless."

"It's all senseless," Tifa said sharply. "But as for her? I don't know. There are probably a lot of people who aren't happy with the fact Rufus is in charge now. Maybe they're going after his family to hurt him? Even in the press photos though, they were never close. There have been rumours that even get down into the slums about the hate between the two of them. Evidently it was pretty legendary, so I don't feel like that would be the way to get to Rufus," she trailed off. She sucked in a deep breath. "I don't know, but I'll tell the others. We've really got to watch our asses if they're going to blame us for every little thing that happens," she said with a frown.

"Yeah, sorry to kill your mood," I said sadly.

"You didn't kill anything. Look, sit here, get a gorgeous guy to come bring you a drink with an umbrella, and relax. We've got only a day here before we need to go, so enjoy it. We can deal with everything else tomorrow." She grinned at me and turned her head back, reclining her chair to stretch out.

"I - " I started.

"No," she commanded with a raised hand. She pointed it at me, despite still laying down with closed eyes. "Man. Drink. Umbrella. Relax."

I couldn't help but laugh, which caused her to smile some. "There's my girl," she said triumphantly.

In front of us, a volleyball whizzed by as Cloud chased it down the shore. He tripped and ate shit in the sand, sitting up with a faceful of it. We both burst out into laughter, and I could feel my fears melting away as the ice in Tifa's drink did the same. By the time we left Costa del Sol, I was revitalized somehow.

The next day, Cloud said he'd gotten inside information on where Sephiroth would be headed, and I felt that pit drop into my stomach again. When he told us we were going to North Corel, I felt even worse. The Golden Saucer was on the other side. Having Sephiroth's path of destruction so close to my son was chilling down to the bone, and I didn't have much to say after that.


	22. Birthday 1

**SHINRA MUSEUM OF FINE ARTS: PRESIDENT SHINRA'S BIRTHDAY GALA**

_2 Years Ago_

_Rufus Shinra_

I was hiding. I was trying not to make it obvious, but there was no real way around it. I didn't want to be subject to my father's public criticism and I didn't want to deal with his increasingly-obvious attempts to brush me off in favour of my sister. I bent my head a little towards the glass of scotch I had in my hands, the scent of it comfort to my nerves. It was pathetic that I had been drinking since my teens, and that only now in my earliest of twenties I could drink half a bottle without so much as a face.

My eyes scanned the city before me, its evening glory a myriad of fireflies amid the black. Lights went as far as the eye could see on the top plate, sparkling and twinkling in different colours and sizes. Ignoring the reactors which put off their own unearthly glow, the majority of the lights tonight were coming from the front entrance of this place. For my father's very publicized birthday event, they had really gone above and beyond ass-kissing. We'd had a fireworks display, which meant that they had to be flown in from Wutai, which cost a fortune. We had spotlights, a media circus, and everyone who was anyone to the company there.

Below, I saw the presidential limousine stop to let out my sister. My father had already made his grand entrance, and she had been typically late. I had been here since four or five helping to coordinate last-minute plans. I didn't know why. It wouldn't make him suddenly realize I was worth a damn, but it helped me blow off steam. Serena had just been at the spa all day, no doubt, doing a bunch of nothing. I was a little shocked to see the white dress she wore, and instantly groaned to myself. I'd chosen to wear white for once. Now we were going to match. Now we'd be on the cover of every tabloid in the city as a 'fashion-forward duo'.

I watched as Reno got out of the limo after her, his arm draped over her shoulders a little too casually. She turned to him, straightening his tie with a broad grin in front of the cameras. I didn't have to see her face directly to know how she looked at him. He allowed himself to be subject to the tie-adjustment, but as soon as she turned to ascend the steps a few paces ahead of him, he looked to the cameras as they glittered and flashed for them both. He reached up and loosened the tie again, and then yanked his shirt from out of his pants and threw his arms out in front of him, straightening his jacket.

Serena turned and tossed her head back with laughter, something the media ate up. If it was one thing she could do, it was control an audience. Had that been what had happened with our father? I tried to convince myself that it was she who had turned him against me, but somehow I logically always fell short. I knew it wasn't her fault that he hated me, but it didn't stop me from resenting the shit out of her.

I tipped back my glass of scotch with some determination, the ice clicking against my teeth in an uncomfortable way as I did so. I felt a gentle touch on the small of my back, and turned my head sharply, hand fisting around the glass as though I were going to use it as a weapon. Elena, however, didn't flinch a muscle, instead blinking at me rapidly.

"Getting started a little early, aren't we?" she asked. Her tone was light, but she wasn't smiling when she said it.

"I figured I'd make myself scarce," I admitted. "I had to have something to keep me company."

She made a sound somewhere between disapproval and rue, sliding her hand off of my back. She gently put her hand around the one which held the glass, and with her other hand slid her index finger between it and my clamped down fingers, then took it from me. The way she did it was deliberate and careful, as though she were afraid I might shatter it in the palm of my hand if I were pressed. She would not have been very far off of the mark, but Elena did know me better than anyone at this point in my life.

"Look at you," I said softly. "Here for five minutes and you're already cleaning up my mess." It made me feel guilty; I knew she cared about me on a level that balanced between obligation and friendship. It made me instinctively not trust her at times, believing that she would be a spy for my father. It created a conflict that I never spoke to her about, because I knew that she wouldn't actually act as such. Elena wasn't that type of person. While she loved her job and she respected her orders, she didn't respect my father for an ounce of how he treated me, and she had never made any motions to hide it. She didn't like Scarlet, either, which was brave of her. Reno's attitude had rubbed off on her, and I was glad for it.

"Stop," she said firmly. "You've not made any mess. I can understand why you don't want to be down there. Your father is eating it up," she said with a laugh. She had set the glass down and had her attention back to me. She rolled to her tiptoes, even in her heels, and began straightening my tie instinctively. It was much the same way Serena had done to Reno moments, ago; the difference was I didn't simply tolerate the gesture; I welcomed it. Elena had always taken care of me in that regard.

"What would I do without you?" I asked her with a lazy smile on my face.

"Well, you certainly would be less skilled without me around," she joked. "Now, what do you think?" she asked. She took a step back from me, and my hand raised, taking one of hers to twirl her around. To be honest, she looked... resplendent. Her long hair had been straightened to a fine silken fall of light blonde. She had on only enough makeup to enhance her beauty, and her dress looked like someone had pulled down the night sky and fashioned it into fabric.

"Where did you get this?" I asked, my fingers gently pinching the necklace she wore; it seemed to be the focal point of her wardrobe, a sapphire-and-diamond treasure against her cream-coloured flesh.

She grinned. "Oh, this old thing?" she joked. "It's on loan. Your sister told me to pick out whatever I wanted. I was a little reluctant, but then I got to see the collection, and..." she trailed off. "I would never have any use for something like this in real life, but to pretend to be a princess for just one night doesn't hurt, right?"

"Serena," I said with a flat tone. "I should have known. Well, at least she's got good taste," I said, trying to minimalize my sigh by following it with an empty laugh. "You look beautiful. More beautiful than a princess. You could be a... baroness. No, an empress," I corrected myself.

She grinned. I knew that she had not missed my remarks, but she chose to ignore them. "Why, thank you," she said in an exaggerated accent, bending slightly at the knee and fanning herself. She straightened up and shook her hair. "Do you want to go downstairs now, or would you rather stay up here in your cave?"

"No, we can go down. Just let me kick another drink back, first," I told her.

"Rufus..." She cut herself off and shook her head. "Nevermind. One more, and then you have to dance with me. And you have to be _nice_. This night needs to go off without a hitch, so promise me I won't have to rip you and your sister apart at any point of this evening," she warned.

I was pouring the last of the scotch into my glass. My back was to her, as was my glass, so I put in a healthy amount. I raised it to my lip and drank quite a large gulp before I turned so she could see its contents, and by then it looked like a rather modest amount. "I promise," I replied with an exasperated tone. I drank the rest of it in a single swallow, and then grabbed her into a tight hug.

"Thank you for finding me," I whispered. I meant it on so many different levels. If Elena hadn't have been in my life, there were several instances where I would have backslid so far I couldn't recover. She had helped me maintain the ounce of sanity I needed to rebuild whenever something hit me and broke me apart.

"Always," she said just as softly. She lingered in the hug for a heartbeat's time longer than either of us usually did. When she pulled away from me, she looked into my eyes for a moment, and then smiled that radiant smile. "Come on, tiger. Let's go dazzle the shit out of 'em so we can get out of here and go do something more entertaining. A drinking game, perhaps?" she suggested.

As I took her arm, I raised an eyebrow. "You're going to encourage a drinking game?" I challenged.

"In a controlled environment. We're going back to Reno's after this. You are, of course, invited, but your sister will be present. You kind of have to accept that," she warned me.

I dipped my head a little. "She's just using him," I said darkly. When she didn't protest right away, I looked at her. "She _is_ using him, isn't she?"

Elena gave me a very large shrug. "Honestly? I don't think so. I tried to talk to her about it, and she maintains that while she doesn't intend to have anything serious with him, she does actually like him," she answered. "But he's..."

She trailed off, and I frowned. "He's?" I prompted.

"You'll just have to judge for yourself," she finalized. She looked up at me. "Not another word about it, now. Let's go, before a rumour starts." And with that, she bid me to lead her out of the room and down the hall.

I was only a little horrified when, as we reached the top of the stairs, the man turned and announced us to the guests below. Evidently nobody really knew where I was and so they assumed that I had just arrived. The city hall did have a helo-pad on top of it, so it wasn't totally unfounded.

"Lord Rufus Shinra and Miss Elena Sharp," he announced.

From below, I could see the sea of people turn. My father rolled his eyes almost instantly, but I felt Elena's grip on my hand tighten, and it reassured me enough to make me walk down the stairs without wanting to smash a glass on his face. When we reached the bottom, Reno was there, lazily leaning against the banister with a champagne flute in his hand.

"You look like a _girl," _he said to Elena, his eyebrows raised in mock surprise.

"That's because I am a girl, asshat," she purred, reaching out to grab his tie and pull it so tightly he made a choking noise.

"Where's my sister?" I asked him, ignoring his annoyed face as he loosened his tie again and rubbed his neck.

"She and Scarlet just exchanged words and she went to go find Rude so that she could blow off some steam without being encouraged to slap the bitch," he informed us. He took a gulp of his champagne and looked around, incredible boredom on his features. That wasn't uncommon for Reno, though – if he wasn't about to die, he was bored.

"Scarlet?" Elena echoed. "What did that washed up hag say to her?"

"I don't think it's what she said, but I think it's what she _did_." He looked at me, directly. "Scarlet was flirting with your dad pretty bad. Serena said something discretely to her, and I think Scarlet told her to step off. Your sister... is not someone that I'd tell to step off."

"No?" I pressed. That was news to me.

"I'm pretty sure she said something to her about your mom, dude," he warned me. "That's not something she will talk about on her _best_ day." He looked over his shoulder at where Scarlet stood, drinking a glass of (what else) red wine and talking idly with other important people from the company. He looked back to me, his eyes narrowed. "She came back to me and I told her to go find Rude."

"Because he won't do anything but let her blow off steam and tell her to relax," I concluded.

He nodded. "If she'd have stayed with me, I'd have listened to her steam for about two seconds and then I'd have told her to hit that bitch with a bottle."

"I had no idea you cared," I said dryly. Elena made a warning noise in her throat, but Reno waved her off. He tipped back the rest of his drink, and then set it on a serving tray as someone whizzed by us.

"It's fine," he said, holding a hand up to her in a stopping motion. He thrust his hands in his pockets and shook his head, moving the tuft of red hair in his face away for a moment. It slid right back into place in his eye only a second later, but he didn't seem to care. "Rufus, I don't care what you think. I like your sister. As long as she's interested, I'm interested. When that day ends, I'll move on. Until then, you'll deal."

There was a tense silence between us until I nodded. I extended my hand to him, which he took. "It's good, man. I know you're alright." Behind us, I heard Elena exhale as though she'd been holding her breath, which meant that she didn't know how that situation was going to go.

Just then, we all saw Serena come back inside, Rude hot on her heels. He was behind her making a frantic waving motion, which meant that whatever had happened outside had _not_ tempered her anger any. I'd seen that look on her face before, too, but it was usually reserved for – well, for me.

"Oh Hades," Elena said. "We need to intercept that before it ends up on the front page." With that, she shoved past me and broke out into a fast walk. I watched her motion to Tseng, who was the closest, and point directly at Scarlet. He was smart enough to get the hint, but unfortunately, Scarlet spotted Serena coming.

"Come on, man," he said, reaching out and giving me a push. "Let's go collect your sister."

By the time we got over there, Tseng had put himself between Serena and Scarlet, but it wasn't helping. The two were firing off at eachother pretty heavily. I looked around the room, for once helpless. There was no way I could stick my neck out into this and not get dragged in, and Elena had told me as much when I got over to the squabble.

"Come on, you two," Tseng said, his voice hinting at frustration. "Just calm down."

I should have told him that those words were as good as fatal, but he found out himself when Serena stuck her finger past him and put it right in Scarlet's face. "You washed up hag, my father wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole," she snarled.

Scarlet set her drink down on the table beside her, and, not to be deterred, simply batted her lashes. "Oh, you silly girl," she sang. She ran her hands along her waist and hips, and then looked up at her with a seductive smile. "You think you know everything. How long was it that your mother was sick? Ten or fifteen years? A man does have certain needs that have to be met..."

"In your wildest dreams," Serena scoffed. "Even if I believed you, we all know that anyone who touches you immediately has to go in and get vaccinated or they'll drop dead from all of the diseases you carry around in your crotch."

"Oh, wow," I blurted. Tseng flicked his eyes back to me and grimaced. He was not having a good time of this. The Turks had surrounded them effectively, minimizing the exposure to the rest of the party. There was live music and it was fairly loud, so for the most part the catfight was going unnoticed, but we all knew it would only take one of them...

Scarlet pushed Tseng aside suddenly and flung the contents of her glass, which she'd snatched back off of the table, at Serena. I didn't know how Reno did it, but he managed to step in the way in the nick of time, pelting his jacket with red wine before it ever touched Serena's beautiful white dress. He looked very pointedly at Scarlet and raised an eyebrow.

"I think you should walk away," he warned her.

"Or what?" she snapped. "You're a Turk. You practically work for me. You can't do anything at all."

All three of them looked at eachother for a moment, their mental communication fine tuned after years of training. It only took a few glances for them all to hive mind without having to say a word, and then Reno spoke up.

"We work for the Shinra company. Your name isn't Shinra, so I think you're more than a little off-base," he corrected her. He seemed to be willing to let this go, and tried to turn my sister around. "Come on," he said softly. It seemed the wine had been the last straw for him – I didn't quite understand why, but I could see where it had visibly gotten him to switch from lazy annoyance to actual anger.

I worked my way behind Serena, and tapped her gently on the shoulder. "Let's let Reno be the voice of reason for once and just go over to where dad is for a while. I'm sure he wants to show your dress off. You look a lot like mom did," I offered.

"Really? You think so?" she said. She looked genuinely taken aback, and for a moment the fight with Scarlet was completely forgotten. "Rufus, that's... the nicest thing you've ever said to me."

Just then, Scarlet leaned forward a little and said, "I don't think you should be wearing white, anyways, sweetheart. I'm not the only one who's been accused of getting around."

There was a flash of blue and sparkles, and Elena came from literally out of nowhere. There was a hard cracking sound and Scarlet dropped to the ground with a thunk, her head to her face, covering the bridge of her nose which had no doubt just been broken by Elena's swift headbutt.

"Just _shut up_ already," she commanded, looking down at the ground.

I was frozen in shock for a moment before it dawned on me that I needed to do something. I waved a waiter over with a raise of my hand. "Please see Miss McQueen's driver brings the car around for her. She's had too much to drink and I believe she needs to retire from the party before she embarrasses herself or the company."

Serena watched as they took Scarlet out, and then looked at the group of Turks which had now formed a semi-circle around us. "Thanks, guys," she said softly. "Let's Rufus and I make a quick round and then we can get out of here. Are we still down for the drinking?" she checked.

Tseng winced. "I'll stay here, because I think at least one of us needs to, but you guys can go ahead," he said.

She made a face, but nodded all the same. "Okay," she acknowledged. She reached out and took my hand. "Come on. Let's go find dad. We may as well get a picture. Hey, why did you wear white, anyways?" she asked as she pulled me away from the rest of the Turks.

"Honestly?" I asked, looking over at her. She was tall; I was 6"1, and she was nearly eye-level with me because of her heels. "Because of mom. The last time dad had a big birthday event that mom was at, she stuffed me into this white tuxedo that I hated. I spilled punch on it and dad beat the living shit out of me for it," I muttered.

"What?" Serena squawked, her head jerking up. "When did that happen?"

"After we got home. We were pretty young - you were ten, I was eleven. Mom was taking you to your room when it happened. You fell asleep on the ride home, remember?" I said gently. I looked back up at our path, which was getting us closer and closer to our father. "When we got out of the car, mom carried you up on her own. As soon as she was out of earshot, he hit me in the face hard enough that he gave me a black eye. Then he went upstairs and helped tuck you in."

"Because you spilled punch?" she repeated.

"Yeah. Serena," I said, turning to look at her. We stopped walking for a moment. "That wasn't the worst thing that ever happened. Why do you think I stayed gone as much as possible as soon as I was able to?"

She shook her head gently, long dark hair like a softly curled curtain, framing her high cheekbones. My sister, I realized, looked a lot like our mother very suddenly. It was kind of funny; when I was little I told her she'd been adopted, but I'd only been making it up to hurt her. It'd worked, too – and my father had beaten me so hard that I couldn't even go out into public for fear of the criticism from the rest of society.

She didn't say anything, but there was something in her face that I could see. My father's voice interrupted our shared moment, however, as he waddled up and wrapped his arms around both of us.

"And here they are now, my two little heirs!" he cheered. He was drunk, badly, the stench of alcohol sweet on his breath. "You two plan your outfits on purpose?" he asked with a loud guffawing laugh. He slapped me on the back so hard it physically hurt, and then let me go completely to spin Serena around and get a better look at her dress.

"You look just like your mother, my darling," he praised her. "I believe this may have been a very pleasant surprise, indeed."

"Oh, daddy," she said. I could see the strain on her face from her smile; it was so fake that it threatened to fade any moment.

"It was her idea," I interjected, deflecting his attention from her for a moment. "And look, this time I managed not to spill any punch on it."

My father just looked at me for a moment, and then he pulled a cigar out of his pocket. He gestured to me, and I pulled a silver lighter from my pocket and lit the cigar for him. He took a heavy puff off of it and blew the smoke into my face. Behind him, I watched my sister's face flash with pain as she struggled to maintain that beautiful smile.

"Yeah?" he asked me. His eyes were glassy and half-lidded, and he looked me up and down. "Too bad your mother isn't here to see it. For once, you actually didn't ruin someone's birthday," he grunted. "I shudder to think of what you would have worn if Serena hadn't been there to dress you," he shot. It was totally unnecessary to take the extra jab at me, but he did anyways.

"Daddy, I'm feeling a little tired, so we're going to go," Serena cut in. I'd never been more grateful for her presence in my fucking life. "Rufus wanted to get a few pictures with you since we all look so wonderful before we left," she added, looking at me briefly.

"Did he?" he asked, not doing anything to mask his disbelief. He looked at me.

"Yep," I said, masking my emotions as I'd learned. I couldn't fake much else off of that, though, but monosyllabic had never deterred my father before. In fact, when he was drunk, it was the safest bet.

"Well, then. Let's get the cameras over here. I wouldn't want to disappoint my little girl, would I?" he asked with a laugh. He pulled Serena down and kissed her on the top of the head, completely ignoring me. It was nothing new to me, but Serena, I knew, would have so many questions once we left. I almost dreaded to go to Reno's after, but I couldn't back out. I didn't back out of anything, ever. Fear was something to be controlled, not to control me.

"Say money," the photographer chimed, just as my father wrapped me in a chokehold for our first photo.


	23. Birthday 2

**SHINRA MUSEUM OF FINE ARTS: PRESIDENT SHINRA'S BIRTHDAY GALA**

_2 Years Ago_

_Reno Bordeaux_

Elena had sent me photos of the dress that Serena had gotten with her phone, but I will be honest when I say that I glanced at them for about a half a second. I think Tseng actually looked at them longer, and I swear I even heard him comment on the particular designer that had made the garment in particular.

The text along with it was, "OMG, isn't it gorgeous?"

"Like, sooooo gorgeous," I mocked. Rude looked up from the paperwork he was doing, and his eyes narrowed a little.

"Let me see," he demanded. He held his hand out, but his phone made a noise.

"You didn't think she'd forward it to all of us?" I asked him incredulously as I leaned back in my chair. I glanced down at my phone and scrolled through more photos she'd sent, including one of Serena changing. Huh. She was looking over her shoulder, the dress still half-on but unzipped, and she was smiling slightly, which meant that she knew Elena was taking the photo.

On one hand, I wanted to make a joke about Serena lezzing out and leaving me for Elena, but on the other hand, the photo was so sexy that I didn't want to ruin it by having Elena anywhere in that image I had in my head. I shook my head and set the phone back down, then leaned forward just enough to spin my chair around.

"Well?" I asked, looking at Rude.

"I think you've got your work cut out for you," was all he said.

Six hours later, we were all sitting in cars that were headed towards the Fine Arts museum. Serena sat next to me, looking down at her own phone. She set it down after about ten minutes of fiddling with it, and looked at me. "You know, we've got about a twenty minute car ride," she said slowly.

I looked at her with a lopsided grin. "You'll ruin your beautiful hair," I reminded her. She opened her mouth, and then shut it again. I'd sacrificed my chance for some fooling around in favour of having to hear her whine for the rest of the night about how she'd messed her hair or makeup up. It was a noble cause.

"We're still going back to the apartment later for drinks, right?" she asked. "It'll be good for Rude to get out. Elena said she's been buzzing around him at work and intentionally trying to drive him crazy."

"She's going to have to try a lot harder than she has been if she really believes that she's able to get under his skin," I said with a laugh.

"Yeah?" she asked.

"Oh yeah," I confirmed, my voice knowing. "Let's just play this night slow and relaxed, that way we don't burn our energy out for later."

"You mean to say 'me' when you say 'us', don't you?" she accused lightly. "You're always relaxed. In fact, I don't even think I've seen you run unless you thought your life was on the line," she said with a laugh.

I slipped an arm around her and pulled her closer, resting my head against hers for a moment. "I'm never in a hurry unless my life is on the line," I confirmed. "Look, I know how wound up Rufus makes you. Just avoid him. I want to sail through this night with ease," I warned her.

"Hey," she said, glancing up. "He may not even show up. Don't forget, he doesn't make any of the social events a habit, so I could have nothing to worry about."

I shrugged a little and looked out the window at the passing lights. "Then we'll have a lovely time," I said, faking an accent to get a little laugh out of her. We rode in silence for the rest of the way, but Serena began to stir when we hit the traffic downtown. We were a block away from the museum when she gasped.

"That's a lot of press," she said softly. She crawled across me inelegantly, on her knees on the seat as she looked out the window. She looked over her shoulder at me. "Do you want to go in around the back?" she asked.

I couldn't tell if it was for my benefit that she offered, or for hers. "The front is fine," I said evenly. I focused on her honey-coloured eyes. "You spent a lot of time getting ready. You deserve to have your picture taken. Don't act like you don't like it," I teased.

She was silent for a moment, and it made me wonder if she was really about to go there and shut me down. Then she smiled. "Okay," was all she said. She turned back to the circus. By the time we'd stopped, they had surrounded the limousine as much as they could. The security had set up a velvet rope the press wasn't allowed to cross, but they leaned over it as far as they pleased.

She pushed the door of the limo open before I was expecting it, and jumped right out into a sea of lights. I hesitated for a moment, wondering how far I was willing to go with this issue I'd suddenly discovered I had. She turned and looked at me, tilting her head a little. Her smile was frozen on her face, and I realized that it was fear. She didn't think I was going to get out.

I slid out after another moment, and I watched as the fear washed off of her features like fog on a mirror. I approached her and draped my arm over her shoulders. The fear came back for a split-second, but someone shouted, "Miss Shinra! Over here! You two look so wonderful!"

I gave her a little tug and directed her to them. Her smile was still unsure, and so I whispered a joke to her that was lost on the din of the crowd. She laughed in spite of herself, and the man snapped away. She was still laughing when other people began shouting out questions, but she didn't answer any of them ever unless she was doing a one-on-one interview or an actual press conference, so she'd just wave with that pretty smile.

I leaned in to her ear, nuzzling through her hair, and said something dirty to her. Her eyes widened and she held her mouth open in surprise, then turned to me and gave me a playful shove. Suddenly, she spotted my tie, and went for it. She adjusted it, grinning as she did it.

"Having fun yet?" she asked me.

"Loads," I said. As she put her hand flat on my chest to smooth the tie out, I said, "You know it's not going to stay like that, right?"

"I know," she said. She pressed her finger onto the tip of my nose and I made a horrible face at her, but she had already turned and began to ascend the steps without me. I waited a moment, and then yanked my tie loose again. While I was at it, I untucked my shirt and adjusted my jacket, too. The circus got more photos as I went up after her, and we aligned again as we stepped through the doors.

The evening, right up until Scarlet's little outbursts, had been mostly dull. Serena was obligated to speak with certain people, and I didn't feel the same duty, so I spent my time evenly between dancing and drinking with her when I could, and antagonizing Tseng when I couldn't. I hadn't seen Elena or Rufus at all, and it actually surprised me a little. Despite Serena's insistence that Rufus wouldn't show up, I knew for a fact he'd told me he would be going. He said he wasn't going to give his father any more reasons, and that was all that I'd needed to hear.

Then, of course, I went to find Serena after a riveting game of trying to embarrass Tseng around beautiful women, and the night began to go downhill. Scarlet was making a big show of being a whore – she had her hand on the president's knee as they all sat down at a table and spoke. Heidegger sat on the other side of the President, alternating between kissing his ass and trying to get a shot of Scarlet's breasts as they threatened to spill out of her shirt.

I didn't catch what Serena said to her because I hadn't gotten close enough yet, but I knew that Scarlet had responded in kind, because Serena clipped my shoulder on her way back to me.

"I'm going to slit her throat," she said to me, and there was nothing but rage in her eyes. "She's over there draping herself on daddy like a cheap suit, then has the audacity to try and insult my mother when I tell her to stop being so easy."

"Okay," I said, taking her by the arm and leading her away. "Well, then you need to go find Rude. I'm pretty sure he's in the stone garden outside, because I know he had to go chase some drunk politicians out of the fountain already. Hang around out there 'til I come and get you. Blow off some steam."

She didn't look like she was going to listen to me at all, and I reached up and put my fingers under her chin. It was a dangerous move given all of the people around us, but honestly, I didn't care. I knew Serena's mother was a very sensitive topic for her; whatever I could to do get that away from her head, I would. "Hey," I said firmly. When I had her attention, I looked into her eyes. "Go find Rude. Chill out. I'll try to find Elena and we can think about leaving. Okay?"

She nodded after an incredibly long pause to consider this. "Thank you," she whispered. She brushed her lips against my cheek as she made her way to the hall that lead outside, and I breathed a sigh of relief. Serena may have been mad, but what she didn't need was to get into a fist-fight with Scarlet McQueen in the middle of a huge publicity stunt. For one, I didn't know if Serena could fight. I knew Scarlet could at least a little, and that worried me. I couldn't have my girl getting her ass kicked, now.

"..fus and Miss Elena Sharp!"

The announcer lead me straight to my target, and I was more than a little surprised to see her descending the stairs at Rufus' hand.

I walked over with the last bit of my second or third drink in my hand and leaned against the banister casually, watching them as they came down. "You look like a girl," I teased.

"That's because I _am _a girl, asshat," she retorted smoothly. She lunged for me and I had nowhere to go without tripping over a fake plant; she grabbed my tie and yanked, causing it to constrict most uncomfortably around my throat.

"GHRRHHHHHCCCCK!"

"Where is my sister?" Rufus asked. He looked bored, and I narrowed my eyes at him as I managed to slip my fingers beneath the cloth of the tie and loosen it. I rubbed my neck, feeling the warmth where I knew a red ring was forming, and muttered to myself.

"She and Scarlet just exchanged words and she went to go find Rude so that she could blow off some steam without being encouraged to slap the bitch," I said.

Elena snorted, leaning against Rufus. "Scarlet? What did that washed up hag say to her?"

I found it incredibly amusing that the duo always used the same modifiers to describe Scarlet, who was neither washed up nor a hag. Scarlet was actually smart and rather pretty, but she was sleazy in a way that everyone saw.

"I don't think it's what she said, but I think it's what she did." I centered my gaze on Rufus, mainly because I knew that I'd seen Scarlet buzzing around him lately and I wanted him to understand what a nasty bitch she was.

"Scarlet was flirting with your dad pretty bad. Serena said something discretely to her, and I think Scarlet told her to step off. Your sister... is not someone that I'd tell to step off." I shook my head a little, a laugh bubbling in my chest. On any day of the week, I could take Serena, but when it came to some topics, I knew my limits.

Rufus looked at me in that dissecting way he always did. He was _such _a Shinra, even if he refused to acknowledge it. "No?" he asked. His voice was icy.

I sighed. "I'm pretty sure she said something to her about your mom, dude," I told him, a warning note to my voice. "That's not something she will talk about on her best day." I glanced back at Scarlet to ensure she was still where I'd left her, and then back at Rufus and Elena. "She came back to me and I told her to go find Rude."

"Because he won't do anything but let her blow off steam and tell her to relax," he said. He made a noise of sudden understanding.

I nodded, shrugging my shoulders a little. "If she'd have stayed with me, I'd have listened to her steam for about two seconds and then I'd have told her to hit that bitch with a bottle."

"I had no idea you cared," he said. His tone was so unaffected and snotty that I almost reached out and dropped him right there on the spot. He was my friend, but his judgmental nature was really starting to piss me off, especially when he had a damned big glass house. Elena made a noise, and I held my hand up to stop her before she began to start in on him.

I tipped the champagne glass back so far that my head went with it, and the bottom was completely vertical by the time I had gotten the rest of it out. I turned and set it down as a waiter darted by us to clean up a spill from someone who was too drunk to hold a drink of their own. I focused on Rufus, then, after telling Elena that it was fine.

Without a drink, my hands felt empty, and so I put them in my pockets absently. I tossed my hair aside and spoke in an incredibly informative tone. "Rufus, I don't care what you think," I reminded him. "I like your sister. As long as she's interested, I'm interested. When that day ends, I'll move on. Until then, you'll deal."

For a few seconds, he didn't say anything. He just stared at me, processing the information in his head. After a full minute, he held his hand out to me."It's good, man. I know you're alright." He grinned a little, and next to him Elena let out a sigh of relief.

After that, all hell kind of broke loose. Serena came back in, and she was on the fucking warpath. Going outside hadn't calmed her down, it had just given her time to think about more reasons to want to kick the shit out of Scarlet, and so when she came back in, she made a beeline right for her, damn the consequences.

We all had to follow, because we were trying to impact the possibility of damage and keep it as low as possible. We may have been friends, but we were still Turks, and we did still work for Shinra, which meant if they looked bad, we looked bad by proxy.

I was content to watch with mild interest, thinking that Tseng had it under control, but then Scarlet knocked him aside and tossed a full wine balloon worth of very rich red wine at Serena. As quickly as I could, I stepped in front of Serena, closing my eyes as I heard and felt the wet splat of liquid against the black of my jacket. And they always asked why I wore dark colours. Now everyone had a reason.

I don't know why, but the absolute idea that Scarlet had just tried to throw red wine all over Serena's dress, which was symbolic of so many things Scarlet would never understand, infuriated me. I hadn't been mad in a while – I'd been irritated, cranky, pissy, and even crabby, but I hadn't been angry. It was almost refreshing, but it also worried me, because it meant I'd stuck my foot in it with Serena somewhere along the line and I didn't know just when.

When Scarlet tried to argue with me after I told her to fuck off, Elena stepped in and broke her nose. Literally, she smashed her with her forehead and I'm pretty sure she could have broken teeth if she'd tried, but the damage done was good enough. I couldn't help but laugh, although I had to try and keep it quiet when Rufus asked for someone to get Scarlet, who was "drunk", out of there. As soon as they cleared her out, I laughed so hard I damned near cried.

Serena then spirited Rufus away, a newfound friendship with her brother rekindled, and she left me with Elena. I nodded to myself, and then looked over at Elena. "So, what's that all about?" I asked her, gesturing to the white duo as they mixed into the thrum of people.

Elena shrugged. "Beats the hell out of me," she said, then paused to stuff a piece of sushi into her mouth. Once she'd swallowed it and some water, she looked over at me. "But I don't know how long it's going to last. Those two are like an incredibly unstable chemical compound. You get them too close, and they'll ignite."

"Don't I know it," I said. "Well, I hope it does last. I think if they could both just drop it for ten seconds, they'd do eachother a lot of good. She's obviously got things to work out, and she can't precisely talk to me about them," I admitted.

Elena nodded. "Yeah. I've known them both for longer than you have, but you were closer to Rufus during his teens than I was because I wasn't willing to go burn down the city with him," she laughed. "But I know that he's pretty damaged. Those two like to play the blame game. If they can learn to bite those little comments back, they might just get their shit straightened out before it's too late," she agreed.

"I am a little nervous about you all coming back to the apartment for drinking," I confessed. "If those two get into a fight, mixing alcohol will only increase the odds that someone gets thrown off the balcony," I groaned.

"I can play the tired card," Elena offered. "I'm not, not really, but if I tell Rufus that I'm too tired to stay out, he'll probably pass."

"Why is that?" I teased. It was nice to be the one that had ammunition for the moment.

"Shut your face," she warned. "It's nothing like that. His dad is hammered, and when that's the case, the Shinra penthouse can't be big enough. He'll want to come and stay in my guest room and he won't do that if I'm not there. I'd rather miss the drinking and let him feel like he can relax for two seconds," she confessed.

"I understand," I said. By now we'd sat down at one of the ornately decorated tables, and I was rubbing a piece from the center flower arrangements back and forth in my hands slowly as we spoke. "Oh, here they come," I said, nudging her chair. She'd regressed into her phone, but sat up as she saw the crowd part for them.

"How bad was it?" I asked Serena, brows raised. Behind her, Elena spoke to Rufus with a near-identical conversation – on her end, anyways.

Serena shrugged. "He was drunk. He was a jerk to Rufus, nice to me. He doesn't even register that other people notice, and I don't know if it's because he's an asshole or if he's drunk, or both," she said, her tone weary. Behind her, I heard Elena say the magic words, but it surprised me when I heard them again.

"Huh?" I said dumbly.

"I said, I think I'm over this party. Can we leave now, or are you wanting to stay?" she asked.

"I'll go have them pull the car around," I answered happily.

I woke up much later to find that Serena was not in bed. While Elena may have played the tired card and been lying, Serena had no mention of her exhaustion until she was changed and on the bed. I left the room for all of ten minutes, and when I came back, she was out like a light. I felt like a lot of things went unsaid that night, and I didn't know how I wanted to deal with that. She and Rufus needed a reconciliation, mostly because I was sick of listening to opposite sides of their bitching, but also because the two of them really did need eachother.

I wondered why in the hell I was even _thinking_ about these things, and it struck me that when I'd snapped at Serena before about her issue with admitting she was seeing me, I'd been a lot less joking and a lot more irritated than I'd initially believed. I wasn't in love with the girl, Gaia no. I just... liked her. And I wanted to keep her around. What I'd told Rufus wasn't untrue – until she didn't want me, I would be present. It just became more about me wanting to ensure that didn't happen until I felt it had run its course.

I pulled on a pair of pants after I searched my living room and found no trace of Serena, because there was only one other place she could be after that. The blinds were open on my sliding glass door that lead out to the spacious balcony I'd mentioned sailing off of earlier in the evening. I found her leaning on the railing, a cigarette in her hand. I'd never seen her smoke before; Elena insisted that it had happened in the past, but I thought it was a vicious myth. Evidently, it was true. Colour me shocked.

"Whatcha doin?" I asked, approaching with extreme caution.

She looked over her shoulder at me, and I could see even in the dim light that her face was tear-streaked. Her expression was nothing but rue, and she didn't dare let her gaze linger but to acknowledge my presence before she turned back to look at the city. She took a drag off of the cigarette and then it returned to being an object in her hand, something for her fingers to connect with as she thought.

"I knew," she said into the wind. I barely heard her, but I still comprehended what she'd said. The statement covered so much ground, and it made me understand more and less in equal parts, the dynamic between she and her brother and father. I moved closer to her, and reached for her. She held her arm up quickly, a hand out in warning to me.

"Don't," she commanded. "I just can't handle it right now."

"Okay," I said, holding my own hands up in a surrendering motion. I backed off of her and dropped down into a chair that I'd moved out there as soon as it had warmed up. Luckily the night air was warm – breezy, but warm. I watched her hair whip around her face as a gust came by; watched as she watched the cherry of her cigarette burn to the end. She raised it to her lips and took one last drag, and I watched her burn herself and throw it over the side. She didn't rub her fingertips together to try and dull the pain, and it occurred to me that I didn't know how long she'd been awake.

"Have you been drinking?" I asked her. It was so odd to hear such a... such a responsible question come from my mouth. But I needed to know, because I needed to know what the hell I'd just signed up for.

"No," she answered abruptly. There was a pause. "Yes. A little. I'm not drunk," she rushed. She turned to look at me, and shook her head, a bitter smile on her face. "I was so little when it started. I didn't know what to do. Mom always fended him off, but when she got sick, she couldn't, and so he took all of his stress out on Rufus. He never hit me, not once. Not even a slap," she confessed. "But I used to hear him at night... I used to lay in bed with a pillow over my head and listen to my dad basically beat my brother half to death."

I exhaled sharply. "I can't answer that, Serena, but I am sorry it happened. I don't know what's wrong in your father's head, but something _is _wrong. Neither of you did anything to deserve the way he's raised you."

"But I was raised _well_," she began.

I cut her off with a wave. I knew that would be her defense – she had it so much better than Rufus, so she should feel both guilty and obligated. "No, and to be honest with you, your dad is startin' to piss me off the more I hear about him." I didn't stand up, instead reclaiming my lazy posture. "Listen, I'm not a therapist. I'm not qualified to tell you anything, and I almost don't want to because I don't want to do more damage than good. No, listen," I insisted, watching her open her mouth again.

"You can't raise one kid in privilege and one kid under the proverbial stairs. Whatever your dad did wasn't independent to _him_. You were a kid, like you said. That kind of thing does a lot of damage to a kid, even if they're _just_ a witness. You're dragged into the situation and you're powerless to stop it. You couldn't just march in there and tell him to be more fair. You were both raised in luxury and had creature comforts, but that doesn't mean that you were well cared for. Look, where I grew up, I saw a lot of this. Sometimes it's just a beating. Sometimes it's a beating and a lot of mind games. Sometimes it's something so much worse. But it's all _bad_, Serena, and it's never your fault."

She nodded, but I didn't know if it was to placate me or because she understood. "Please don't tell Elena," she said. Her voice was raw and scratchy, and I could tell that she'd been crying for a _while_ before I'd come out there. Luckily, she'd stopped. I couldn't deal with crying. It would have been counterproductive.

I made an almost-irritated noise. "Of course I'm not going to tell Elena. I'm not going to tell _anyone_. You think I'm going to rush off to write a report about this? No. I'll tell you what, though, you two need to sit down and you need to do it soon. You've got a small window where both of you are on the same side, and if you miss it, Serena, I don't think it will ever open again."

She had moved from the balcony and was leaning on the door to my left, which told me that she was ready to go inside. She seemed unwilling to move until I did, though; experimentally, I sat forward. She put her hand on the indention of the door, ready to open it. I stood up and she slid it to the right; I followed her in. Once inside, I went past her to the kitchen, and began trying to find something for her to drink. I settled on a bottle of water, and I threw it to her, thankful that she didn't catch like a helpless woman (that is to say, she was able to catch at all).

"Drink it," I told her.

"I'm not -"

"Drink it," I repeated. It wasn't an option. "You're not going to be hungover tomorrow, and you're not going to work yourself up so much that you puke all over my bed. So. Drink," I ordered. She drank a few gulps, which satisfied me enough to let her back into the bedroom.

"Why do you think there's only a small window for my brother and I?" she asked as she followed me down the hall. It was obvious she'd been thinking about it since I said it, but she couldn't come up with anything good.

"I don't know," I told her. "But it's the feeling I get." Rufus liked to think he wasn't emotional, but he was very much so. His act of great defiance to the world would be to shut himself down in a rage and let the quiet icy persona set in, as if to teach them all a lesson and say, 'You should have loved me before when I cared, but now I don't so NYAH'. I regretted feeling that way, but it was just how I thought that made me draw the conclusion. I wasn't that far off-base either, from what I knew of him.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," she said after a long silence between us. I had just been staring at the darkened ceiling, waiting for her next comment. I couldn't say I wasn't relieved for it to have ended so quickly, but that was unfair to say. I had been asleep for much of this, what she was processing; I just came in at the end. Still, it wouldn't hurt my feelings any to _not_ feel as though fixing her very delicate relationship with her brother rested on _my_ shoulders.

"Then we won't," I promised her. She rolled onto her side, resting her head on my chest, and I automatically placed my arm around her. "But if you wake me up tomorrow before noon, I will sign you up for therapy sessions before you have time to get dressed," I added, a note of warning to my voice. I heard a soft laugh from the darkness, and I nodded my head a little. Thank Gaia she still had her wits about her enough to laugh.

I don't know what time it was when I finally went back to sleep, but when I woke up, it was overcast outside and Serena was still sleeping, so at least she'd made good on her effort not to try and bother me while I slept.


End file.
